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    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Russian
      • Home Country:
      • Armenia
      • Current Location:
      • Czech Republic

    • Join Date: Feb 2016
    • Posts: 5
    #1

    Could you please edit my Mot. Letter ?

    Could you be so nice and look through this letter of motivation ? Thank you

    XXX University , Faculty of XXXX

    10.02.2015
    Dear Sir/ Madam,

    With this letter I would like to express my strong interest for studying in Master's program of “Brain and Cognitive Science” in Faculty of Science. Currently, I finished Master’s degree in XXXXX University, at the study program of “Personality Psychology”.

    During my Bachelor’s study, which was “General Psychology”, I was among top five students and earned a full-ride governmental scholarship due to my high marks. Throughout my university life I gained a great theoretical and practical insight into both, personality psychology and cognitive psychology. Neuro-biology was also significant part of my studies due to such subjects as Anatomy of CNS, Psycho-physiology, Physiology of Higher Nervous and Sensor Systems and etc. I am eager to accumulate more theoretical knowledge and research practice and enlarge my knowledge of specialization and I believe that this program suits my profile and career prospects.

    I am fortunate to have this exciting opportunity in doing a research in my field of study. During my Bachelor’s study I wrote papers about: “Students’ dis-adaptation during the first year of study”, “Students’ emotional pressure during examination period” and “ Psychological prerequisites for the formation of professional activity”. My Master’s degree thesis was about “Students’ coping strategies during crisis periods”. My term papers one way or another are related to cognitive psychology . While my diploma work was aimed on studying the influence of University environment on cognition formation, my Master’s thesis important part was directed on studying of cognition development during the crisis periods of adolescents’. I’ve already conducted research among students in Asia and I would also be interested in doing a more cognitive oriented research elsewhere, particularly in Europe to receive comparative data.

    Although cognitive science, as you could have noticed, interested me, there was no opportunity to study it more precisely due to limitations of education in my home country. Because of my financial situation I could not study abroad, therefore, I will be very grateful to be provided with scholarship to improve my education and widen my career prospects. Knowledge gained on the studies at University of Amsterdam I plan to transfer to my home country, where I intend to work in public sector or at the University.

    This scholarship opportunity I perceive as an opportunity to continue my studies, learn about new cultures and meet interesting foreign scientists at the same time. I find it very important that we learn from others experiences and in our everyday work have in mind how other nationalities plan their everyday life and manage the inevitable difficulties.

    At the end I would like to point out that I am determined to make the most out of the scholarship program.Given my past history of commitment to excellence, I am confident that I will bring a high level of energy and enthusiasm to your program. I am sure to exceed your expectations, because of both my academic skills and my diligence.


    Thank you for considering my application.
    Sincerely yours,

  1. teechar's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • Iraq
      • Current Location:
      • Iraq

    • Join Date: Feb 2015
    • Posts: 5,580
    #2

    Re: Could you please edit my Mot. Letter ?

    Quote Originally Posted by naragass View Post
    Could you be so nice and look through this letter of motivation ? Thank you

    XXX University , Faculty of XXXX


    10.02.2015


    Dear Sir/Madam,


    With this letter I would like to express my strong interest in for studying in Master's program of “ applying for the Brain and Cognitive Science master's program in at the Faculty of Science of your university. Currently, I recently finished a master’s degree in personal psychology in at XXXXX University. , at the study program of “Personality Psychology”.

    During my Bachelor’s study, which was “General Psychology”, I was consistently among the top five students and earned a full-ride governmental scholarship due to my high marks. Throughout my university life, I gained a great theoretical and practical insight into both personality psychology and cognitive psychology. Neuro-biology was also a significant part of my studies due to such with subjects such as Anatomy of CNS, Psycho-physiology, Physiology of Higher Nervous and Sensor Systems, and etc. I am eager to accumulate gain more theoretical knowledge and research practice, and enlarge my knowledge of specialization and I believe that this program suits my profile and career aspirations. prospects.

    I am fortunate to have this exciting opportunity in of doing research in my field of study. During my bachelor’s study, I wrote papers about: titled “Students’ dis-adaptation during the first year of study”, “Students’ emotional pressure during examination period” and “Psychological prerequisites for the formation of professional activity”. My master’s degree thesis was about titled “Students’ coping strategies during crisis periods.” My term papers one way or another are were related to cognitive psychology. While my diploma work was aimed on at studying the influence of university environment on cognition formation, my master’s thesis important part main focus was directed on studying of on cognition development during the crisis periods in of adolescence. I’ve already conducted research among on students in Asia, and I would also be but I am interested in doing more cognitive-oriented research elsewhere, particularly in Europe to receive obtain comparative data.

    Although cognitive science, as you could may have gathered, noticed, greatly interests me, there was no I have not had the opportunity to study it more precisely in depth due to limitations of education in my home country. Because of my financial situation, I could not study abroad. Therefore, I will be very grateful to be provided with a scholarship to improve my education and widen my career prospects. I plan to use the knowledge I gain on the studies while studying at the University of Amsterdam I plan to transfer when I return to my home country, where I intend to work in the public sector or at the university.

    This scholarship opportunity I perceive as an opportunity to continue my studies, learn about new cultures and meet interesting foreign scientists from other countries at the same time. I find it very important that we learn from others' experiences and in our everyday work have keep in mind how other nationalities plan their everyday life and manage the inevitable difficulties.

    At the end, I would like to point out that I am determined to make the most out of the scholarship program.Given my past history of commitment to excellence, I am confident that I will bring a high level of energy and enthusiasm to your program. I am sure to exceed your expectations because of both my academic skills and my diligence.


    Thank you for considering my application.

    Yours faithfully,
    Sincerely yours,
    .

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Russian
      • Home Country:
      • Armenia
      • Current Location:
      • Czech Republic

    • Join Date: Feb 2016
    • Posts: 5
    #3

    Re: Could you please edit my Mot. Letter ?

    Dear Teechar,

    I am very thankful for your amendments. If I can help you back somehow with my humble set of knowledge in Psychology and Russian language please let me know :).

  2. teechar's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • Iraq
      • Current Location:
      • Iraq

    • Join Date: Feb 2015
    • Posts: 5,580
    #4

    Re: Could you please edit my Mot. Letter ?

    Quote Originally Posted by naragass View Post
    Dear Teechar,

    I am very thankful for your amendments. If I can help you back somehow with my humble set of knowledge in Psychology and Russian language please let me know :).
    Wow! That's so nice of you.
    I'm a huge fan of Russian literature; and I would love to be able to read it in Russian. Maybe one day I'll take up your offer to learn some of your beautiful language.
    Oh, I also think Russian classical music is the finest in the world.

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Russian
      • Home Country:
      • Armenia
      • Current Location:
      • Czech Republic

    • Join Date: Feb 2016
    • Posts: 5
    #5

    Re: Could you please edit my Mot. Letter ?

    Well , it is not my mother language , but I am native in Russian :). I also consider Russian classic music to be one of the finest :D. However Russian classic literature (I assumed you mean that one) is very heavy, due to depth of the sense in it and vary in language style. Some poems, like ones of early Pushkin, are hard to understand even for natives :D. Russian language is very hard to comprehend, you should be ready for sayings like "yes-no, maybe", which means polite refusal with slight possibility of acceptance :D

    Anyhow, it would be my pleasure to help you :)

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