Flogger
Member
- Joined
- Mar 2, 2016
- Member Type
- Student or Learner
- Native Language
- Persian
- Home Country
- Iran
- Current Location
- Iran
It's a real story which happened to I and my uncle nearly 2 months ago. Would you please proofread it?
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“God, it is so cold, for how many days you have not been here, uncle?” I said and then moved towards the heater as a falcon chasing its prey.
The heater was turned on and I stooped to adjust its flames, meanwhile a tiny thing drawn my attention. Furtively accosting it, I signed my uncle there was an animal under your bed. When I got close enough I declared: “Uncle, a mouse is under your bed.”
“A rat!? From where in the seven hells it has come to my house!?” Unbelievably he uttered.
“Till now, I have thought that just snakes are the sigil of his house but I guess I have got to add rats to this list too. Where the heck is your house? In the midst of a forest? Could hospital not grant you a better house?” I angrily muttered.
“What should we do now?” Disappointedly my uncle asked.
“Well, first of all we should neat your room” I replied, “For your medicine books omnipresent in this room will frustrate our efforts to catch the rat.” I continued, “Secondly, I recommend your finding two stuff for killing this filthy arrival.”
“Ok” my uncle said, “I’ll be right back with two weapons”
When my uncle came back, he gave me a hammer! But because I really didn’t want to kill a rat with such an arm I chose a sandal. Anyway, we besieged the mouse and tried to divert it towards a corner. My first blow failed and the bloody rat that seemed like a phantom eluded us.
“Darn!” I yelled, “There is no way in the hell, filthy rat”
The rat went under the sofa. I rapidly accosted the sofa and overturned it to make the rat come out of there and endanger its sanctuary. It came out and wanted to go to another room but suddenly it fell. Yes! My vigilant uncle with his green cover of air gun had hit it and sent the rat to the hereafter.
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Regards.
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The mouse
The moon bathed the countryside in a silver light and a biting wind made the leaves rustle like soft silks. I and my uncle got out of the car and tremulously hit the house.“God, it is so cold, for how many days you have not been here, uncle?” I said and then moved towards the heater as a falcon chasing its prey.
The heater was turned on and I stooped to adjust its flames, meanwhile a tiny thing drawn my attention. Furtively accosting it, I signed my uncle there was an animal under your bed. When I got close enough I declared: “Uncle, a mouse is under your bed.”
“A rat!? From where in the seven hells it has come to my house!?” Unbelievably he uttered.
“Till now, I have thought that just snakes are the sigil of his house but I guess I have got to add rats to this list too. Where the heck is your house? In the midst of a forest? Could hospital not grant you a better house?” I angrily muttered.
“What should we do now?” Disappointedly my uncle asked.
“Well, first of all we should neat your room” I replied, “For your medicine books omnipresent in this room will frustrate our efforts to catch the rat.” I continued, “Secondly, I recommend your finding two stuff for killing this filthy arrival.”
“Ok” my uncle said, “I’ll be right back with two weapons”
When my uncle came back, he gave me a hammer! But because I really didn’t want to kill a rat with such an arm I chose a sandal. Anyway, we besieged the mouse and tried to divert it towards a corner. My first blow failed and the bloody rat that seemed like a phantom eluded us.
“Darn!” I yelled, “There is no way in the hell, filthy rat”
The rat went under the sofa. I rapidly accosted the sofa and overturned it to make the rat come out of there and endanger its sanctuary. It came out and wanted to go to another room but suddenly it fell. Yes! My vigilant uncle with his green cover of air gun had hit it and sent the rat to the hereafter.
----------------------------------
Regards.