Student or Learner
I would like to write down my sentences below.
(1) John felt embarrassed about swearing with his friends in front of his girlfriend. They told him a lot of jokes to help reduce his embarrassment.
(2) Mary asks Tom, "Where is Andrew? I haven't seen him for a long time." He replies, "He is now in France for a holiday (or for a vacation)."
I showed the sentences to my native-English speaking neighbor. He said that both examples read awkwardly, but he didn't explain what went wrong.
Could someone please explain my mistakes? Thank you very much.
I'm not a teacher. I speak American English. I've tutored writing at the University of Southern Maine and have done a good deal of copy editing and writing, occasionally for publication.