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  1. keannu's Avatar
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    #1

    fair business ethics.

    When he was born, America was in a big economic recession, and that's why his father's company went bankrupt. So his father tried to help his grandfather's shop, but his grandfather, who had a strong economic concept, said that he couldn't hire his father as he couldn't pay even his son a high salary due to fair business ethics. So his grandfather wasn't able to hire his father with a small salary.

    If I have made any errors, especially in the underlined, please correct me.

  2. Charlie Bernstein's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: fair business ethics.

    Quote Originally Posted by keannu View Post
    When he was born, America was in a big economic recession, and that's why his father's company went bankrupt. So his father tried to help his grandfather's shop. But his grandfather ["Economic concept" doesn't mean anything here, so I deleted this part.] couldn't hire his father because he couldn't pay even his son a high salary due to fair business ethics. So his grandfather wasn't able to hire his father with a small salary. The last two sentences don't make sense. Did the grandfather want to pay a high salary or a low salary? You seem to be saying both. And why "even his son"?]

    If I have made any errors, especially in the underlined, please correct me.
    I don't know what you're saying in the last part. Can you rephrase it?

    About "economic concept": Do you mean his grandfather was a good businessman?

    About "fair business ethics": Is business always ethical? What ethics are you talking about? Is there a simpler way to say it?
    Last edited by Charlie Bernstein; 11-May-2016 at 00:09.
    I'm not a teacher. I speak American English. I've tutored writing at the University of Southern Maine and have done a good deal of copy editing and writing, occasionally for publication.

  3. keannu's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: fair business ethics.

    It all comes down to this.
    His grandfather had a strong fair business ethics for himself - he wanted to treat every employee equally based on one's capability and his father couldn't be an exception. Even though his father was his grandfather's blood, his grandfather couldn't pay a higher salary to his father when his father didn't deserve it - because salary level is determined by the employee's capability.
    So his grandfather could neither hire his father at a higher salary due to fair treatment of every employee nor hire his father at a lower salary as his father couldn't survive with such a small salary.

    I'm sorry this might seem complicated, but this is what I heard from the original writer.
    By "economic concept", I tried to mean "fair use of money by not wasting it on unfair things", but it doesn't seem to convey such meaning.

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    #4

    Re: fair business ethics.

    When he was born, America was in a big economic recession, so his father's company went bankrupt.
    His father tried to to get a job at his grandfather's shop. His grandfather, who had a strong (overbearing) sense of ethics and fairness, could not bring himself to employ his father as one of his staff, as he thought the latter would not fit into the job. He felt it would go against his conscience to pay him too high a salary that he doesn't deserve or too low a salary that he could not survive with.
    I am not a teacher.

  4. Charlie Bernstein's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: fair business ethics.

    Quote Originally Posted by keannu View Post
    It all comes down to this.
    His grandfather had a strong fair business ethics for himself - he wanted to treat every employee equally based on one's capability and his father couldn't be an exception.

    Oh! Okay. Then I would just say something like:

    - His grandfather treated all his employees equally.
    - His grandfather would not favor a family member unfairly.
    - His grandfather paid based on ability, not on connections.
    - His grandfather had strong ethics and would not favor family members. (NOT "fair business ethics" - that's weak and redundant.)


    Even though his father was his grandfather's son, his grandfather wouldn't pay a higher salary to his father when his father didn't deserve it - because salary level is determined by the employee's ability.

    That's a better sentence.

    So his grandfather could neither hire his father at a higher salary, out of fairness to other employees, nor hire his son at a lower salary, because his son couldn't survive on such a small salary. [The pronoun "his" refers to the grandfather, so it should be "his son," not "his father."]

    I see. So the grandfather would pay others too little to live on, but he wouldn't do that to his son! That doesn't sound ethical to me!


    I'm sorry this might seem complicated, but this is what I heard from the original writer.

    What original writer? Who's essay is this?


    By "economic concept", I tried to mean "fair use of money by not wasting it on unfair things", but it doesn't seem to convey such meaning.

    No. The words "economics" and "concept" do not say anything about fairness or waste.

    Keep at it. And explain who you're writing this for.

    Thanks!
    I'm not a teacher. I speak American English. I've tutored writing at the University of Southern Maine and have done a good deal of copy editing and writing, occasionally for publication.

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