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      • Native Language:
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    #1

    I'd like to know if my text sounds clear and natural. Do you have some advice?

    Real story of lives


    It was the beginning of the last century and my great-grand parents were very rich. My great-grand father was a coffee farmer in Brazil and coffee was achieving the highest prices ever. They had an amazing life, having dinners with piano concerts and poetry recitals in French. Life was a party.
    And then there was the New York stock market crash and the Great Depression began. Crop prices dropped. They lost everything: the farm, the money, the dignity. I do think my great-grand father had his own depression. As depression as a disease was unknown, he was seen as a man with a lack of character. Definitely it made things worse. He was unable to provide his family and my great-grand mother started receiving traveling people to sleep at the house. Unfortunately, she died from cervical cancer in a couple of months, leaving nine kids and her husband by their own.
    Moving by despair, I suppose, my great-grand father tried to choke his youngest daughter and killed himself with a razor.
    It is a story of loss and sadnesses, but also of recovering. The six younger girls were adopted by an uncle. My grandmother and her two brothers were by their owns. To be fair, fourteen-year-old boys were not considered children any more those times. All of them could have jobs and raise their own families despite of the tragedy. Although I didn't inherit any money, they taught me that no matter was the situation, you can grow with it.

  1. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: I'd like to know if my text sounds clear and natural. Do you have some advice?

    Welcome to the forum.

    When are you going to submit your essay to your teacher/tutor?
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

  2. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #3

    Real Stories about Real Lives

    I think this might be a better thread title.

    Did people stop buying coffee and thus the price plunged?

    • Member Info
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      • Portuguese
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      • Brazil
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    #4

    Re: I'd like to know if my text sounds clear and natural. Do you have some advice?

    Quote Originally Posted by emsr2d2 View Post
    Welcome to the forum.

    When are you going to submit your essay to your teacher/tutor?
    Thank you!
    I already submited my essay, but my teacher will correct only grammar, punctuation, etc (I know, it is important) but I'd like to see if it sounds good and not only about the mistakes.

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Portuguese
      • Home Country:
      • Brazil
      • Current Location:
      • Brazil

    • Join Date: Nov 2015
    • Posts: 3
    #5

    Re: Real Stories about Real Lives

    Quote Originally Posted by emsr2d2 View Post
    Welcome to the forum.

    When are you going to submit your essay to your teacher/tutor?
    Quote Originally Posted by Tarheel View Post
    I think this might be a better thread title.

    Did people stop buying coffee and thus the price plunged?
    Thank you for your help!
    Coffee is a commodity, what means its price is determined by the stock market. When the New York stock market crashed, causing the Great Depression, non-industrialized countries, as Brazil, suffered a lot because all we exported were commodities.

  3. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #6

    Re: I'd like to know if my text sounds clear and natural. Do you have some advice?

    Quote Originally Posted by criscunha View Post
    Thank you!
    I already submited my essay, but my teacher will correct only grammar, punctuation, etc (I know, it is important) but I'd like to see if it sounds good and not only about the mistakes.
    Let us know when you get your essay back from your teacher. We will be interested to see what corrections he/she made. Post the corrected version and then we can comment on it.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

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