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      • Native Language:
      • Pashto, Pushto
      • Home Country:
      • Pakistan
      • Current Location:
      • Pakistan

    • Join Date: Jul 2016
    • Posts: 1
    #1

    Question Please check the grammar and rate it

    I have written this essay about Education Importance.
    Please take a look at it and find out grammar mistakes
    "Essay:
    “Bara Khyber Agency Children”
    It was a fine bright day when someone knocked the door. I opened the door and saw that it was our home’s owner. He said that you have to leave the house. We all were very upset because it was hard to find a rent house in those days. But trusted real estate dealers found a new rental house and we shifted there. Our new neighbors were from “Bara Khyber Agency”, there were three kids and his beloved uncle and they were living together. His uncle always used to advise his nephews, he wanted his nephews to study to have a bright future. But they were not fond of education. They always played games in the street. I always got upset when I see their uncle. One day I decided to talk to his nephew and after gathering up my guts, I went towards him and asked politely, “Do you study?” He said “Yes, I go to school”. I again asked another question that "Do you like to study?" He said “I don't like to study. It is not beneficial. Why I have to waste my time. There is no fun in it." I replied "Education is the only option for the best future. You can’t chase your dreams in this dark world without the light of knowledge". He didn’t respond and went to his football match. On the next month, it was our “School Annual Day”. I achieved a 1st Prize for the “Best Hand Writing Competition”. My neighbor uncle’s kid said to me “Where did you bought it. It is very beautiful”. I said “I didn’t bought it, I achieved it in our “School Annual Day”, If you do hard work, you will also achieve this”. Then he realized that I am on the wrong path. I waste a lot of my time doing the things which won’t give me any advantage except time loss. He was really motivated and decided to study and to do hard work. He used to get help from me and I also helped him with joy. He was changed 360 degrees. Instead of playing with football now he was busy with his studies and it was a source of joy to him. 1 year later, a peon from the school came to his home and handed a parcel to his uncle. His uncle opened it and was feeling very happy. It was not a simple paper, it was the good news of his nephew’s hard work. His nephew was selected for the 1st prize in Mathematics competition. His uncle’s joy knew no bounds and he also congratulated his nephew and at last he knew that knowledge is power "

  1. emsr2d2's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • British English
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      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • UK

    • Join Date: Jul 2009
    • Posts: 41,918
    #2

    Re: Please check the grammar and rate it

    Welcome to the forum.

    When are you going to submit your essay to your teacher/tutor?
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

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