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  1. milan2003_07's Avatar
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    #1

    Story about a road accident

    Dear friends,

    A few days ago I returned from Moscow where I visited my brother. He has just got his driving licence and has just started to drive on his own without an instructor sitting together with him in the car. Unfortunately we had two accidents during my 4-day stay. Luckily no one was injured, but the car was partly damaged, especially for the second time. I'll tell you the story of the 2nd accident in brief and please help me correct the phrases I have doubts about:

    "We turned off the highway and entered a country road leading to our summer house. We were driving at a speed of nearly 40 km/h and saw a railway bridge ahead of us. There was a road narrowing under the bridge we had to pass. We were expoected to lose/reduce speed in the vicinity of the bridge, but my brother didn't notice the sign since it hung almost behind the tree. We had to yield the road to a big truck moving towards us but didn't do it due my brother's failure to notice the sign. When we saw the truck moving, we abruptly pressed the breaks and my brother turned the steering to the right thinking was a lane there, but actually that was the place for one-way traffic and as a result we bumped into the sidewalk right under the bridge and car stopped after the collision. Luckily we didn't collide with the truck itself. The right tyre burst, the disc bent, but the biggest problem was the front steering column, which broke into two parts. However, there was a car service right near the place of our accident and they helped us repair the car to get back home".

    Please have a look at the phrases in bold and if some are used incorrectly, please suggest better options.

    Thanks

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
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      • Malaysia
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      • Malaysia

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    #2

    Re: Story about a road accident

    When do you have to submit the homework to your teacher?
    I am not a teacher.

  2. milan2003_07's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: Story about a road accident

    it's not my homework, it's just a story from my personal experience, which I'd like to correct.

    Thanks in advance

    • Member Info
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    #4

    Re: Story about a road accident

    Quote Originally Posted by milan2003_07 View Post
    Dear friends,

    A few days ago I returned from Moscow where I visited my brother. He has had just got his driving licence and has had just started to drive on his own without an instructor sitting together with him in the car. Unfortunately we had two accidents during my our 4-day stay. Luckily no one was injured, but the car was partly damaged, especially for at the second time. I'll tell you the story of the 2nd accident in brief and please help me correct the phrases I have doubts about:

    "We turned off (exited/got off) the highway and entered a country road leading to our summer house. We were driving at a speed of nearly 40 km/h and saw a railway bridge ahead of us. There was a road narrowing The road narrowed under the bridge we had to pass. We were expected to lose/reduce speed in the vicinity of before the bridge, but my brother didn't notice the warning sign since it hung almost behind was hidden by the a tree. We had to yield the road give way to a big truck moving towards us coming from the opposite direction but didn't do it due my brother's failure to notice the sign. When we saw the truck moving approaching us, we abruptly pressed the breaks slammed on the brakes and my brother turned the steering to the right thinking was a lane there, but actually that was the placelane for one-way traffic traffic in the opposite direction and as a result we bumped into the sidewalk our car hit the sidewalk right under the bridge and car it stopped after the collision. Luckily we didn't collide head-on with the truck itself. The right tyre burst, the disc rim was dented bent, but the biggest problem was the front steering column, which broke into two parts. However, there was a car service centre right near the place of our accident and they helped us repair the car to get back home so that we could drive home".

    Please have a look at the phrases in bold and if some are used incorrectly, please suggest better options.

    Thanks
    .
    I am not a teacher.

  3. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: Story about a road accident

    You don't need "a speed of". Just say "We were travelling at nearly 40kph."
    You weren't going to "pass the bridge". You were going to "pass/drive under/over the bridge".
    I wouldn't combine "abruptly" with "slammed on the brakes". Saying "slammed on" clearly indicates that it was a sudden braking manoeuvre.
    Your brother "turned the steering wheel to the right" or "steered the car to the right."
    Say "thinking there was a lane there".

    (My comments refer to the contents of tedmc's corrected version.)
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

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