Please correct my motivation letter

[Asheri.pt]

Hi all,

I am new to this forum but have been following it for a while with interest. As I am actively seeking for a job I would appreciate it if someone could read my motivation letter, as I am not native English. Thank you very much in advance!

[FONT=Liberation Serif, serif]
Dear xxx,[/FONT]



[FONT=Liberation Serif, serif]I finished my studies in the area of Forensic Sciences in June 2015. [/FONT]



[FONT=Liberation Serif, serif]As I am passionate about Forensic Science and laboratory research, I pursued a Master's degree in Legal Medicine and Forensic Sciences and a Post-graduation in Forensic Anthropology from the University of xxx, xxx. During my studies, I have found that my interests are focused primarily in the areas of laboratory techniques and crime scene investigation. I was particularly enthusiastic about Forensic Toxicology, Forensic Anthropology and Forensic Genetics. Even though my academic education had a focus on Forensic Anthropology, I have gained knowledge of Forensic Toxicology during my master's and post-graduation program. As such, I am convinced that during my studies, conferences/workshops attendance and internship experience, I have developed the skills and personality traits needed to meet the highly competitive demands of this job position - such as attention to detail, integrity, accuracy and reliability.[/FONT]

[FONT=Liberation Serif, serif]Additionally, my extra-curricular activities (like being engaged in a student association) have sharpened my organizational, team working and communication skills. During my employment period as an internship coordinator, I supervised several activities such as guiding student groups and took charge of some administrative duties.[/FONT]


[FONT=Liberation Serif, serif]Therefore, I am confident that my background makes me an appropriate candidate and trust that I will also be able to contribute to your goals with my skills and experiences gained to date. I am energetic, self-motivated and try to overcome challenges with initiative. The “xxx” offers the unique chance to develop a profile that perfectly fits my career aspirations – it meets both my strength in natural sciences and deep interest in Forensic Science techniques - and I am convinced that it is the next logical step following my graduation. I assure you that I will make the best out of this opportunity, earning valuable experiences, learning new and essential skills that will enhance my career prospects.[/FONT]



[FONT=Liberation Serif, serif]I am familiar with the work developed by xxx and am particularly interested in your laboratory, research and development and collection network career areas. A placement within this team would offer a challenging and rewarding opportunity with a highly respected organization, which I perceive as being one of the leading companies in Forensic Toxicology. It is with interest that I notice you encourage the training and development of your employees, which gives me the assurance of being able to continue to develop my skills and grow personal and professionally, in order to reach my full potential.[/FONT]

[FONT=Liberation Serif, serif]I am looking forward to finish the training period with success and becoming a Forensic Toxicologist under your guidance.[/FONT]


[FONT=Liberation Serif, serif]Please find enclosed my CV. I am available to provide further information as needed. Thank you in advance for considering my application, and I look forward to hearing from you.[/FONT]

[FONT=Liberation Serif, serif]Yours sincerely,[/FONT]​

[FONT=Liberation Serif, serif]xxx[/FONT]
​

 

[Tarheel]

Say:

I finished my studies in the area of forensic sciences in June 2015.

 

[teechar]

Dear xxx,

I finished my studies in [STRIKE]the area of[/STRIKE] forensic science in June 2015

As I am passionate about forensic science and laboratory research, I [STRIKE]pursued[/STRIKE] obtained a Master [STRIKE]degree[/STRIKE] in Legal Medicine and Forensic Sciences degree and another postgraduate [STRIKE]Post-graduation[/STRIKE] qualification in Forensic Anthropology from the University of xxx, xxx. During my studies, I [STRIKE]have[/STRIKE] found that my interests are focused primarily in the areas of laboratory techniques and crime-scene investigation. I was particularly enthusiastic about Forensic Toxicology, Forensic Anthropology and Forensic Genetics. Even though my academic education had a focus on forensic anthropology, I [STRIKE]have[/STRIKE] gained useful knowledge [STRIKE]of[/STRIKE] in forensic toxicology during my master's and other postgraduate [STRIKE]-graduation[/STRIKE] program. As such, I am convinced that [STRIKE]during[/STRIKE] as a result of my studies, conferences/workshops attendance and internship experience, I have developed the skills and personality traits needed to meet the highly competitive demands of this [STRIKE]job[/STRIKE] position, such as attention to detail, integrity, accuracy and reliability.

Additionally, my extracurricular activities (like being engaged in a student association) have sharpened my organizational, team working and communication skills. During my employment period as an internship coordinator, I supervised several activities such as guiding student groups and took charge of some administrative duties.

Therefore, I am confident that my background makes me an appropriate candidate, and I trust that I will also be able to contribute to your goals with my skills and experiences gained to date. I am energetic and self-motivated, and I try to overcome challenges with initiative. The “xxx” offers [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] a unique chance to develop a profile that perfectly fits my career aspirations – it [STRIKE]meets[/STRIKE] suits both my strength in natural sciences and deep interest in forensic-science techniques, and I am convinced that it is the next logical step for me. [STRIKE]following my graduation.[/STRIKE] I assure you that I will make the best out of this opportunity, earning valuable experience, and learning new and essential skills that will enhance my career prospects.

I am familiar with the work developed by xxx and am particularly interested in your laboratory, research and development and collection network career areas. A placement within this team would offer a challenging and rewarding opportunity with a highly respected organization, which I perceive as being one of the leading companies in forensic toxicology. It is with interest that I notice you encourage the training and development of your employees, which gives me the assurance of being able to continue to develop my skills and grow personally and professionally, in order to reach my full potential.

I am looking forward to finishing the training period with success and becoming a forensic toxicologist under your guidance.

Please find enclosed my CV. I am available to provide further information as needed. Thank you in advance for considering my application, and I look forward to hearing from you.


Yours sincerely,
xxx

I have no idea what the text highlighted in blue means.

 

[Tarheel]

Asheri.pt, you capitalized several things because, apparently, you think they are important. That's not the standard we usually use. The word "science" for example, is not a proper noun. The word "forensics" is also not a proper noun. (I'll let you find the rest for yourself.)