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  1. Newbie
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    #1

    Please Review my Motivation Letter

    Dear Sir or Madam,

    I am writing this letter to apply for admission into the Master of XXXX program at the XXXX University. I have always been interested in the concentration of natural product, since my bachelor I attended pharmacy concentration in natural product in my Universitas Gadjah Mada, evidenced by doing a lot of research in that field, becoming laboratory assistant, an taking a speaker in outreach program of my campus, educating villagers in East Borneo on how to plant and use herbs medicine for family, and taking a part as a participant in international seminar held in Yogyakarta. that research in herbal medicine which I believe is what drives advances in the medical domain and, ultimately, enhances many people’s quality of life. My home country needs new ideas and mostly young medical professionals, and I want to be one of them. Thus, I would like to prepare for my career by obtaining a master degree. I have chosen to apply for the XXXX University because I really like its system of study of the outstanding and advanced teaching methods and the college's reputation as a leader in herbal medicine and how to standardize it. See it as a chance to enrich my knowledge and professionally outgrowth thereby contribute to the development of the humanity.

    Indonesia is a big country with many kind of natural resources, including herbal medicine. For a long time ago, people have been used many kind of herbs to maintain their health or curing disease, as we all known as “Jamu”. Unfortunately, people intend to leave this herbal medicine culture with the great development of conventional and modern medicine. But actually the case is, herbal medicine tend to have less side effects and can be used for a long term without worrying long-term effect. The utilization of Jamu is still very limited and hasn’t been scientific. In this case, Indonesia can learn from the developed country, such as Germany, Korean, and China, which make their herbal medicine scientific and use it in their daily life as a complementary therapy, together with conventional medicine. Studies show that the growth, utilization, and knowledge of Indonesian people of herbal medicine is still limited. Even so, with my experience in outreach program and volunteer activity, they have enthusiasm to learn about herbal medicine and want to use it in their daily life if they know the use. The problem is the limitation of human resources who can educate them and understand well about how to treat herbal medicine from crude until becoming a product. Knowing this problem, as a young generation, I realize that I also have responsibility to solve my country’s problem. By first pursuing a master degree in that field of natural product, I can improve my qualification, accelerate my leadership skills and adaptable skills so that I am ready to contribute and make some change in my community as I finish my study.

    If I'm fortunate enough to be accepted into your program, I will work hard to achieve my goals and aspirations. I want to research about liver protector in my thesis. Taking research in herbal as a liver protector will be essential for me to prepare myself in helping my community solving. Nowadays, people tend to get degenerative disease such as diabetes, hypertension, and antihyperlipidemic. These diseases require them to consume medicine for a long time, which usually has effect on their liver. By this research, I want to reduce the worry of people to consume conventional medicine in a long term. But, the problem is that the variation of active chemical compounds planting in different area. So, we can’t just estimate the amount of chemical compound simply just by the amount of crude material. This method can be solved by metabolomics study, by profiling the component of active chemical compound.

    In conclusion, I believe the best place to learn about natural product and how to standardize it is in XXX university. I would like to say that I am eager to gain new professional experience and in my view, this XXX program is the best way to achieve that. I understand that studying abroad is going to be the most challenging step in my life so far, but I also believe I can withstand deal with any problems challenge I will may face and make the most of the knowledge and experience gained through this study program. I hope will do my best to contribute my talents and efforts positively to your university and to become a worthy member of the team.
    Thank you in advance for your consideration and time,

    Yours faithfully,

    XXX

  2. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: Please Review my Motivation Letter

    First paragraph. First sentence. Say:

    I am writing this letter to apply for admission to the Master of XXXX Program at XXXX University.


  3. Newbie
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      • Indonesian
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      • Indonesia
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    • Join Date: Nov 2016
    • Posts: 19
    #3

    Re: Please Review my Motivation Letter

    Quote Originally Posted by Tarheel View Post
    First paragraph. First sentence. Say:

    I am writing this letter to apply for admission to the Master of XXXX Program at XXXX University.


    So the rest is okay?

  4. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #4

    Re: Please Review my Motivation Letter

    Be patient. Tarheel tends to make corrections one sentence at a time. I'm certain there will be more responses from him.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

  5. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: Please Review my Motivation Letter

    Well, I'll try. (This one is really long, so it may take a while.)

  6. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #6

    Re: Please Review my Motivation Letter

    Please rewrite that really long sentence as three or four shorter sentences.

  7. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #7

    Re: Please Review my Motivation Letter

    What do you mean by "the concentration of natural product"? Medicinal herbs?

  8. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #8

    Re: Please Review my Motivation Letter

    By "since my bachelor" do you mean since you earned your bachelor's degree?

    What do you mean by "pharmacy concentration in natural product"?

    (i had a post that disappeared which I am going to have to replace with three or four shorter ones.)

  9. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #9

    Re: Please Review my Motivation Letter

    Perhaps:

    I took _______ at ________ ____________.

    And:

    I did considerable research in the field of _____.

    And:

    I worked as a lab assistant for _____.

  10. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #10

    Re: Please Review my Motivation Letter

    I don't know what you mean by "taking a speaker". Did you give talks to the villagers?

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