Motivation letter proofreading

[Tarheel]

Back to the paragraph. Say:

I would like to experience studying abroad for myself.

[Tarheel]

Capitalization. We don't capitalizee "bachelor's degree". (You could also say "bachelor degree". They are both used.) Also, don't capitalize "accounting" or "finance" unless they are course titles.

[Tarheel]

Next paragraph. Say:

Regrettably, a whole semester abroad is not possible for me since I am working on the side.

[Tarheel]

Say:

However, I do not want to miss the chance to study abroad, which is why I am applying for the International Summer Academy 2017.

[Tarheel]

Perhaps:

Your offer to attend summer school would perfectly fit in with my schedule.

[Tarheel]

Say:

Thanks to the XY Summer Academy I could benefit from studying abroad without being away from home for a whole semester.

[Tarheel]

The rest of it is rather confusing to me. For example, what do you mean by "greater opportunities and obstacles"?

I suggest that you rewrite those paragraphs with the goal of making things clearer.

[Tarheel]

Please do not crowd too much into one sentence. It can make the sentence hard to read and confusing.

[bubbha]

Second paragraph. Say:

Since October 2016 I have been in the master degree program.

Don't forget the apostrophe-s after "master"!! It's "master's degree".

This is a shibboleth: people who write or say "master degree" are instantly identified as being non-native English speakers.

[bubbha]

Capitalization. We don't capitalize "bachelor's degree".

Usually not, but you need to look at how the school uses the term. Some schools actually like to capitalize degrees in their literature, and if they do so, you should do the same.

The Chicago Manual of Style recommends against capitalization, however.

Also, it is always "bachelor's degree" in English. "bachelor degree" is very commonly used by non-native speakers, but I've never seen a native speaker say or write it without the 's. It just sounds wrong to my internal English circuitry.