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  1. Member
    English Teacher
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    #1

    Please check my letter and help polish it. Many thanks in advance.

    *************************
    Dear Sir or Madam,

    Iím writing to apply for working as an intern at your charitable foundation. Iím presently a student of Senior 3, and I can speak English fluently. Besides, Iím an active and enthusiastic person who enjoys working with different people and can adapt well to new situations. Charity is a noble cause, and I always have a strong passion for it. I believe that being an intern at your foundation will be a wonderful practice for me. Iíll be willing to send you any further information if you consider my request.
    Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to your reply.

    Sincerely,
    Li Hua
    **************************
    The above is self recommendation writing practice for my students. It presumes that you are a student of Senior 3, and youíre writing a letter of recommendation to a charitable foundation that is recruiting an intern who is in charge of translation and writing. The above is my own version. It serves as a possible version for my students after checking their work. I hope someone would check it and help perfect it. Many thanks in advance.

  2. teechar's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: Please check my letter and help polish it. Many thanks in advance.

    Quote Originally Posted by rodgers white View Post
    *************************
    Dear Sir or Madam,

    Iím writing to apply for work ing as an intern at your charitable foundation. Iím presently a student of Senior 3, and I can speak English fluently. Besides, Iím an active and enthusiastic person who enjoys working with different people and can adapt well to new situations. Charity is a noble cause, and I've always had have a strong passion for it. I believe that being an intern at your foundation will be a wonderful practice experience for me. Iíll be willing to send Should you require any further information, please do not hesitate to contact me. if you consider my request.

    Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to your reply.

    Yours faithfully,
    Sincerely,

    Li Hua
    **************************
    The above is self recommendation writing practice for my students. It presumes that you are a student of Senior 3, and youíre writing a letter of self recommendation to a charitable foundation that is recruiting an intern who is to be in charge of translation and writing. The above is my own version. It serves as a possible version for my students after checking their work. I hope someone would check it and help perfect it. Many thanks in advance.
    I've never heard of a self-recommendation letter. I mean, who is going to say something bad about themselves?!

    To me, this just another case of HR gone berserk!

  3. Member
    English Teacher
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    #3

    Re: Please check my letter and help polish it. Many thanks in advance.

    Quote Originally Posted by teechar View Post
    I've never heard of a self-recommendation letter. I mean, who is going to say something bad about themselves?!

    To me, this just another case of HR gone berserk!
    Teechar, you are right. This is just an ordinary job application letter. In China, when we say "self recommendation letter", it means you just want to advertise yourself to a company or an organization that you love to work for. But here it's just a job you're applying for. So, it's not the same situation.
    By the way, why do you think this letter will drive HR(Human Resoures)crazy? I just do not get it.

  4. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #4

    Re: Please check my letter and help polish it. Many thanks in advance.

    Teechar didn't say the letter would send HR crazy. Saying "This is HR gone berserk" indicates that such a letter is evidence that the situation in HR generally is currently crazy.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

  5. Member
    English Teacher
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    #5

    Re: Please check my letter and help polish it. Many thanks in advance.

    Quote Originally Posted by emsr2d2 View Post
    Teechar didn't say the letter would send HR crazy. Saying "This is HR gone berserk" indicates that such a letter is evidence that the situation in HR generally is currently crazy.
    You mean the working staff in HR will become as busy as a bee or even crazy because of this recruitment?
    Last edited by rodgers white; 20-Feb-2017 at 01:44.

  6. Member
    English Teacher
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    • Join Date: Jan 2016
    • Posts: 264
    #6

    Re: Please check my letter and help polish it. Many thanks in advance.

    *************
    Dear Sir or Madam,

    Iím writing to apply for working as an intern at your charitable foundation. Iím a grade 3 student at Hong Xing Senior high School and interested in English. Besides, I am equal to the job with the following reasons: Firstly, I have a command of English grammar. Meanwhile, I can work patiently and carefully. Whatís more, my school think highly of this opportunity and will introduce the foundation around.

    I will appreciate it if I could be chosen.

    Sincerely,

    Li Hua

    ******************

    The above was written by one of my students. And the following was the version after I proofread my student's work. Please check the following and help me further improve it. The word limit is between 60 and 90. Many thanks in advance.


    *********************
    Dear Sir or Madam,

    Iím writing to apply for work ing as an intern at your charitable foundation. Iím a Grade 3 student at Hongxing Senior High School and interested in English. Besides, I am equal to qualified for the job with because of the following reasons: Firstly, I have a command of English grammar. Meanwhile, I can work patiently and carefully. Whatís more, my school thinks highly of this opportunity and will introduce the foundation around encourage us to apply.

    I will appreciate it if I could be chosen can receive your early reply.

    Yours faithfully,

    Li Hua

    *******************
    Last edited by rodgers white; 20-Feb-2017 at 01:48.

  7. teechar's Avatar
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    #7

    Re: Please check my letter and help polish it. Many thanks in advance.

    Quote Originally Posted by rodgers white View Post
    You mean the working staff in HR will become as busy as a bee or even crazy because of this recruitment?
    No, I meant that the world of HR is going overboard, inventing things (e.g., the self-recommendation letter) to justify their own existence!

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