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    #1

    Please check my summary writing and help improve it.

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    Technological change is everywhere and affects every aspect of life, mostly for the better. However, social changes are brought about by new technology are often mistaken for a change in attitudes.

    An example at hand is the involvement of parents in the lives of their children who are attending college. Surveys on this topic suggests that parents today continue to be “very” or “somewhat”overly-protective even after their children move into college dormitories. The same surveys also indicate that the rate of parental involvement is greater today than it was a generation ago. This is usually interpreted as a sign that today’s parents are trying to manage their children’s lives past the point where this behavior is appropriate.

    However, greater parental involvement does not necessarily indicate that parents are failing to let go of their “adult” children. In the context of this discussion, it seems valuable to first find out the cause of change in the case of parents’ involvement with their grown children. If parents of earlier generations had wanted to be in touch with their college-age children frequently, would this have been possible? Probably not. On the other hand, does the possibility of frequent communication today mean that the urge to do so wasn’t present a generation ago? Many studies show that older parents—today’s grandparents—would have called their children more often if the means and cost of doing so had not been a barrier. Furthermore, studies show that finances are the most frequent subject of communication between parents and their college children. The fact that college students are financially dependent on their parents is nothing new; nor are requests for more money to be sent from home. This phenomenon is neither good nor bad; it is a fact of college life, today and in the past.

    Thanks to the advanced technology, we live in an age of bettered communication. This has many implications well beyond the role that parents seem to play in the lives of their children who have left for college. But it is useful to bear in mind that all such changes come from the technology and not some imagined desire by parents to keep their children under their wings.


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    The task is : Please summarise the article above in your own words, using between 40 and 80 words.
    The following is just my attempt at summarizing and I hope someone would proofread it and polish it. It serves as an example for my students to follow after I finish checking their summaries.

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    Technological change affects people’s behavior, but not their own attitude. For example, today’s parents are considered to be overly-protective or involve too much in their children’s life, but the studies show that parents of both today and the past are eager to communicate with their children frequently if the means and cost allowed, and college students’ financial dependence also accounted for their more frequent communication. In a word, it is not the attitude but advanced technology that explains greater parental involvement.
    Last edited by rodgers white; 03-Mar-2017 at 03:34.

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    #2

    Re: Please check my summary writing and help improve it.

    Technological change affects people’s behavior, but not their own attitude. For example, today’s parents are considered to be overly-protective or get involved too much in their children’s life lives, but thestudies show that parents of both today and the past are eager to communicate with their children frequently if the means they are able to and costs allow, and college students’ financial dependence on their parents also accounted for their more frequent communication. In a word short/a nutshell, it is not the attitude but advanced technology that explains greater parental involvement (in their children's lives).


    I think you should be more specific what you mean by advanced technology. Do you mean modern gadgets like smartphones, tablets, laptops, etc.?



    Last edited by tedmc; 03-Mar-2017 at 09:56.
    I am not a teacher or a native speaker.

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    #3

    Re: Please check my summary writing and help improve it.

    I think you should be more specific what you mean by advanced technology. Do you mean modern gadgets like smartphones, tablets, laptops, etc.?


    Maybe I should. The problem is that the author doesn't tell us about the detail. I guess that the author uses "advanced technology" here just to refer to modern technology as a whole, which leads to a better communication now.

    but thestudies show that parents of both today and the past are eager to communicate with their children frequently if the means they are able to and costs allow


    I don't think the above is well written. Maybe I should rewrite like this: but lots of studies show that parents of the past would probably have been more eager to communicate with their children than those of today, only if the means and costs had not been an obstacle.


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    #4

    Re: Please check my summary writing and help improve it.

    Second version:

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    Technological change affects people’s behavior, but not their attitude. For example, today’s parents are considered to be overly-protective or get themselves involved way too much in their children’s lives, but lots of studies show that parents of the past would probably have been more eager to communicate with their children than those of today, only if the means and costs had not been an obstacle. What's more, college students’ financial dependence on their parents has also accounted for more frequent communication between them. In short, it is not the attitude but advanced technology that explains dramatic changes in our society, like greater parental involvement in their children's lives.

    ************************************************** ***********************
    Last edited by rodgers white; 03-Mar-2017 at 13:29.

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    #5

    Re: Please check my summary writing and help improve it.

    Quote Originally Posted by rodgers white View Post
    Technological change affects people’s behavior, but not their own attitude. For example, today’s parents are considered to be overly-protective or excessively involved too much in their children’s life, but the studies show that parents, of both today and in the past, are eager to communicate with their children frequently if the means are available and the cost is reasonable. allowed, and Moreover, college students’ financial dependence also accounted for their more frequent communication. In a word, it is not the a change in attitudes but advanced technology that explains the greater parental involvement in their children's life.
    The part in red is wrong. Read the text again and re-write it.

  6. Member
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    #6

    Re: Please check my summary writing and help improve it.

    Quote Originally Posted by teechar View Post
    The part in red is wrong. Read the text again and re-write it.
    Moreover, studies also tell us that in spite of the technological progress, college students' financial dependence on their parents has never changed - nor has the request for more money from their parents.

    So, the third version goes as follow:

    **********************************************
    Technological change affects people’s behavior, but not their attitude. For example, today’s parents are considered to be overly-protective or excessively involved in their children’s life, but studies show that parents, both today and in the past, are eager to communicate with their children frequently if the means are available and the cost is reasonable. Moreover, studies also tell us that in spite of the technological progress, college students' financial dependence on their parents has never changed - nor has the request for more money from their parents. In a word, it is not a change in attitudes but the advanced technology that explains the greater parental involvement in their children's life.
    Last edited by rodgers white; 05-Mar-2017 at 02:49.

  7. teechar's Avatar
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    #7

    Re: Please check my summary writing and help improve it.

    Quote Originally Posted by rodgers white View Post
    **********************************************
    Technological change affects people’s behavior, but not their attitude. For example, today’s parents are considered to be overly-protective or excessively involved in their children’s life, but studies show that parents, both today and in the past, are eager to communicate with their children frequently if the means are available and the cost is reasonable. Moreover, studies also tell us that in spite of the technological progress, college students' financial dependence on their parents has never changed - nor has the students' request for more money from their parents. In a word, it is not a change in attitudes but the advanced technology that explains the greater parental involvement in their children's life.
    I added "students" to clarify that the request for more money is not coming from the parents.

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