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  1. Newbie
    Student or Learner
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Bengali; Bangla
      • Home Country:
      • Bangladesh
      • Current Location:
      • Bangladesh

    • Join Date: Mar 2017
    • Posts: 1
    #1

    Could you help me by checking and correcting mu motivation letter please

    Motivation Letter

    In the modern globalized world the competition between the companies and their products are increasing day by day. All the companies of the world are trying to capture National as well as international market. The companies of Bangladesh are also growing not only nationally but also internationally at the same pace. Therefore, they now need high skilled Management Professionals with knowledge on international business more than ever.

    As a student of management myself I have an aim to achieve a great height in the field of Business and Management and work as a high skilled professional in the development of overall Business and Management system in Bangladesh. I have been very passionate about this from a very young age and completed all my studies in the field of Business and Management. I have completed my Higher Secondary and Secondary School Certificate examinations in Business Studies. After that I studied Bachelor of Business Administration (BBA) in Management Studies and Master of Business Administration (MBA) in Human Resource Management from Jagananth University, one of the most reputed public Universities in Bangladesh. Besides academic studies, I actively took part in various extracurricular activities, which includes Photography, Organizing and coordinating various workshop and cultural programs, participating in quiz and debate competitions and these helped me to develop my inter personal skills. Moreover, I have various hobbies such as traveling, reading books, watching movies, playing video games, Surfing internet, reading blogs, watching YouTube videos and so on. I have been highly passionate about sports from my very childhood specially Football and Cricket. I was the captain of my school Football team which helped me to build my leadership skills from a very young age.

    However, I have always wanted to extend my knowledge and skills from national to international boundaries by studying an international degree course in the field of Business and Management. After completing MBA I worked in PRAN-RFL Group, a well reputed and fastest growing international group of companies in Bangladesh and learnt about the rising importance of international business in our country which influenced me to study International Business. On top of that, there has always been an advanced reputation of professionals in our country who has an international degree. Hence I applied for Master's in International Business and Management M.A. from Osnabrück University of Applied Sciences in Germany.

    Germany has the most organized and stable Economy in the world. It is called the engine of Europe for its strong and stable Economical Growth. There is no comparison of Germany in the International Business and export. Furthermore, The Education of Germany is very well reputed all around the world. I think there is no better country to study Business and Management than Germany. Therefore, I have chosen Germany to pursue my higher studies.

    As Bangladesh is one of the fastest growing developing countries in the world it needs highly skilled Management professionals now more than ever. My goal of life is and always will be to contribute in the development of my country and people through my knowledge. I think highly organized study quality in Germany will help me to reach my goal. Being one of the best universities in Germany for studying Business and Management, Master’s in International Business and Management M.A. from Osnabrück University of Applied Sciences will increase my Knowledge and skill to a greater extent. I am highly confident that I will be able to prove your judgment right by utilizing my talent and highest level of dedication by which both I and my country will be benefited if I can get this chance of admission. I hope my ambition will be helped with a positive response.


    Best Regards,


    Shah Naoaj Ahmed

  2. teechar's Avatar
    Moderator
    English Teacher
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • Iraq
      • Current Location:
      • Iraq

    • Join Date: Feb 2015
    • Posts: 7,709
    #2

    Re: Could you help me by checking and correcting mu motivation letter please

    This is not well organized. Start by introducing yourself, and say what you're doing now. Write separate paragraphs about your background, achievements, interests, goals and aspirations, what motivated you to apply for this course and how you see yourself fitting into it, etc. And most importantly, be specific and cut out the waffle. Try again.

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