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  1. VIP Member
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    #1

    As Clive and his coworkers went to a pub

    I am wondering if my sentences sound natural.

    As Clive and his coworkers went to a pub at happy hours, little did they know they would end in the melee caused by the two rival supporters gangs. Bottles flew through the air, windows were smashed, furniture were broken, and some hooligans suffered serious injuries.

  2. teechar's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: As Clive and his coworkers went to a pub

    Make the following changes:
    - "during happy hour"
    - "rival gangs of football supporters" (no "the")
    - "furniture was broken"
    - "some of the hooligans".

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    #3

    Re: As Clive and his coworkers went to a pub

    I will try again after teechar's corrections.

    As Clive and his coworkers went to a pub during happy hour, little did they know they would end in the melee caused by two rival gangs of football supporters. Bottles flew through the air, windows were smashed, furniture was broken, and some of the hooligans suffered serious injuries.

  4. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #4

    Re: As Clive and his coworkers went to a pub

    Quote Originally Posted by Bassim View Post
    I will try again after teechar's corrections.

    As When Clive and his coworkers went to a pub during happy hour, little did they know they would end up in the melée caused by two rival gangs of football supporters. Bottles flew through the air, windows were smashed, furniture was broken, and some of the hooligans suffered serious injuries.
    See above.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

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    #5

    Re: As Clive and his coworkers went to a pub

    As a Francophone, I would always include the acute accent in melée. However, it's commonly spelled without one: "melee".
    I am not a teacher.

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    #6

    Re: As Clive and his coworkers went to a pub

    Quote Originally Posted by teechar View Post
    Make the following changes:
    - "during happy hour"
    - "rival gangs of football supporters" (no "the")
    - "furniture was broken"
    - "some of the hooligans".
    The "the" may be required by the context, which we do not know.

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    #7

    Re: As Clive and his coworkers went to a pub

    Quote Originally Posted by GoesStation View Post
    As a Francophone, I would always include the acute accent in melée. However, it's commonly spelled without one: "melee".
    Oh dear. I should have said aspiring Francophone. My aspirations were not advanced when I left the circumflex off of mêlée. That accent is not strictly required nowadays but nearly every publication still uses it.
    I am not a teacher.

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