Results 1 to 3 of 3
  1. #1
    Bassim is offline VIP Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • Student or Learner
      • Native Language:
      • Bosnian
      • Home Country:
      • Bosnia Herzegovina
      • Current Location:
      • Sweden
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    6,948

    A cup of tea clutched in her hand

    I am wondering if my sentence is grammatically correct. "Is it correct to begin my sentence as I did, or do I need "with" at the beginning?

    A cup of tea clutched in her hand, Hannah paced the room, glancing at her watch all the time, and waiting for her son's return after a night out.

  2. #2
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is offline Moderator
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • UK
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    61,347

    Re: A cup of tea clutched in her hand

    You don't need "With" at the start.
    I'd change the end to "waiting for her son to return from a/his night out".

    The pedant in me says that she can't be both "glancing" at her watch and doing it "all the time". I suggest "glancing repeatedly at her watch".
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

  3. #3
    Skrej's Avatar
    Skrej is offline Key Member
    • Member Info
      • Member Type:
      • English Teacher
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Posts
    3,698

    Re: A cup of tea clutched in her hand

    Or even something like 'glancing frequently', to increase the sense of how often she's looking.
    Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •