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  1. #1
    ambitious-girl's Avatar
    ambitious-girl is offline Senior Member
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    Differences between Iran and The united states

    I would be appreciate it if someone could check this paragraph for any mistakes.


    There are several differences between the United States and Iran. America is leading industrialized, the most advanced and developed country while Iran is considered as a third world and developing one/nation. Unlike/In contrast to Iran, America is known to be the land of opportunities, where everyone can achieve whatever they set their mind to. Thousands of people immigrate to this country every year from different parts of the world to have access to such opportunities. Iran has a mono-culture society, where you rarely see people from different cultural and racial backgrounds, except from Afghans. Racial and cultural diversity, however, is the United States’ strengths, where there is a cosmopolitan atmosphere in almost every state. When it come to freedom of speech, expression, press and religion, Iran is rated as 175th country in the world. By contrast, America is also known for being at the forefront of freedom and equality. In Iran, a baby born out of wedlock is a horrible sin for which there is no forgiveness whereas it is really commonplace in America, which is such permissive society.


    Thanks in advance
    English is my great passion.

  2. #2
    teechar's Avatar
    teechar is offline Moderator
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    Re: Differences between Iran and The united states

    Quote Originally Posted by ambitious-girl View Post
    I would be appreciate it if someone could check this paragraph for any mistakes.


    There are several differences between the United States and Iran. America The US is leading highly industrialized, and is the most advanced and developed country in the world, while Iran is considered as a third-world and developing one/ nation. Unlike /In contrast to Iran, America the US is known to be as the land of opportunity, ies, where everyone can achieve whatever they set their mind to. Thousands of people immigrate to this that country every year from different parts of the world to have access to such opportunities. By contrast, Iran has is largely a mono-cultural society, where you rarely see people from different cultural and racial backgrounds, except from for some Afghans. Racial and cultural diversity, however, is are the United States’ strengths, where there is a cosmopolitan atmosphere in almost every state. Moreover, when it comes to freedom of speech, expression, press and religion, Iran is rated as 175th country in the world. By contrast, America is also known renowned for being at the forefront a champion of freedom and equality. In Iran, a baby born out of wedlock is considered the product of a horrible sin for which there is no forgiveness, whereas it is really commonplace not really such a big deal in America the US, which is such permissive a more liberal society.


    Thanks in advance.
    .

  3. #3
    ambitious-girl's Avatar
    ambitious-girl is offline Senior Member
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    Re: Differences between Iran and The united states

    Thanks Teechar. It was so helpful and informative as usual.

    I have a question regarding passage above:
    Is it OK to have two phrases "by contrast" in the fourth and seventh lines of the essay. If I want to replace one of them with something new or different, what will be your alternative suggestions?

    Thanks.
    Last edited by ambitious-girl; 31-Aug-2017 at 08:19.
    English is my great passion.

  4. #4
    teechar's Avatar
    teechar is offline Moderator
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    Re: Differences between Iran and The united states

    You can use "in contrast" or "on the other hand."

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