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  1. #1
    Rezafo's Avatar
    Rezafo is offline Junior Member
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    Please suggest correction. summary of an article.

    Electricity power drawn up by not-working equipment

    The article is revealing not only interesting to know but an altering information about all the electric equipment and devices we use them every day in our daily life. The information goes through the details of how much electrically can a device draw while itís not really working. As we continue reading we get surprised to know that the amount of power drawn up by an idle device equals to a certain amount of electricity used by a household in Africa. Then the article furnish us with some tips and advice how to avoid letting our devices draw such amount of power which itís not seen or felt, but in fact it is wasted and it adds up our electricity bill at the end of each month.

  2. #2
    teechar's Avatar
    teechar is offline Moderator
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    Re: Please suggest correction. summary of an article.

    Quote Originally Posted by Rezafo View Post
    Electricity power drawn up by not-working inactive equipment

    The article is revealing not only in that it provides interesting to know but an altering information about all the electric equipment and devices we use them every day in our daily life. The information goes through the It gives details of how much electrically can a device can draw while itís not really working. As we continue reading we get surprised to know that The amount of power drawn up by an idle device equals to a certain the amount of electricity used by a household in Africa. Then The article furnish us with presents some tips and advice on how to avoid letting our devices silently waste all that power which draw such amount of power which itís not seen or felt, but in fact it is wasted and it adds up to our electricity bill at the end of each month.
    .

  3. #3
    Rezafo's Avatar
    Rezafo is offline Junior Member
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    Re: Please suggest correction. summary of an article.

    Quote Originally Posted by teechar View Post
    .
    Thanks a lot, and here under goes my comments:

    1- By crossing out "alerting", this is not what I wanted to say. This verb is necessary because I - as a writer who is speaking his mind - have this message in my mind and I do want it be in the text; (Information given in the article are both interesting and at the same time alerting).

    2- Why in the line 3 this part should be omitted "As we ............ that"

    3- Doesn't " a certain amount of " and " the amount of " sound the same? Why should one be preferred over the other one?

    4- To furnish sb with sth, is quite meaningful and we have this usage. [ https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/furnish ]

    5- I really liked the replacement of "Silently waste all that power which" with what I've written.

    6- Why no "up" after "add" in the last sentence. Knowing that, if we don't waste we will certianly have a bill with a certain charge, but when we waste electricity, in fact we will use more and consequently our bill will be added up; barbecue it has already an mount in the bill and some extra charges are going to be added to the final amount in the bill.

    Thanks for your time.

  4. #4
    teechar's Avatar
    teechar is offline Moderator
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    Re: Please suggest correction. summary of an article.

    Quote Originally Posted by Rezafo View Post
    1- By crossing out "alerting", this is not you've changed what I wanted to say. This verb is necessary because I - as a writer who is speaking his mind - have this message in my mind, and I do want it be in the textóthat the information given in the article are is both interesting and at the same time alerting.
    I have no idea what you mean by "altering". Can you explain it using other words?

    Quote Originally Posted by Rezafo View Post
    2- Why in the line 3 should this part should be omitted? "As we ............ that"
    If you want to included it say, "As we continue reading, we are surprised to find out that, etc."

    Quote Originally Posted by Rezafo View Post
    3- Doesn't "a certain amount of" and "the amount of" sound mean the same? Why should one be preferred over the other one?
    No, they do not mean the same. "A certain amount of" is not specific.

    Quote Originally Posted by Rezafo View Post
    4- To furnish sb with sth, is quite meaningful and we have this usage. [ https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/furnish ]
    I gave you a more straightforward version, but "furnish" is possible. Say, "the article furnishes us with, etc."

    Quote Originally Posted by Rezafo View Post
    6- Why is there no "up" after "add" in the last sentence?
    "Add up" (no object), "Add up to", and "add" are not the same.

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