Animax: John, a brilliant...

[Gaya87]

Hi, can someone please check the following sentences? Thank you.
Did I use suitable words for the second line? ..Soon after,..

Long summary
John, a brilliant and charismatic criminal profiler known for his uncanny insights, is called to inspect a pair of bodies found buried in concrete. Soon after, he finds his profiling abilities have disappeared. He takes a leave of absence from the police, and begins therapy sessions with psychiatrist Dr Sasy.

Short summary
John, a gifted criminal profiler known for his uncanny insights, is called to inspect a pair of bodies found buried in concrete, but unfortunately his profiling abilities have disappeared.

 

[emsr2d2]

They're both grammatically correct. However, the sequence of events in the short summary doesn't match that in the long one. In the long one, it appears that his abilities disappear after he has inspected the bodies. In the short one, it appears that he discovered his abilities had disappeared before he got around to inspecting the bodies.