[Grammar] Please help me to correct these sentences

[MAJSH]

The following staff members' ID card is not working. It seems that there is a problem with the smart chip on the cards. The RTA has issued a notice for making it mandatory for all telecom subscribers to re-verify existing customers through the ID based E-KYC process. In order to work this process, the chip enabled ID card should work, but the card chip doesn't work. Therefore, we request you to arrange for the replacements cards with our RPS office.

In addition, Mr. Ivan's family' ID has been expired last month, In order to renew their ID, firstly the address on Ivan's ID has t be updated based on their current residence address. The address should be same for the household head and family member otherwise; they will not renew it. Since they are all under special registration, we request RPS office to arrange for the renewal of their ID and replace all the ID cards which are not working. Please remember that they can't do it their own as they are all under special registration.

 

[emsr2d2]

The following staff [STRIKE]members'[/STRIKE] member's ID card is not working. You used "card is not working" so I assume you are talking about one card belonging to one member of staff. In that case, the apostrophe goes after "member" and before the "s".

It seems that there is a problem with the smart chip on the cards. Grammatically correct but it doesn't match with the first sentence which talks about only one card.

The RTA has issued a notice [STRIKE]for[/STRIKE] making it mandatory for all telecom subscribers to re-verify existing customers through the ID-based E-KYC process. Note the extra hyphen required.

In order to [STRIKE]work[/STRIKE] do this, [STRIKE]process,[/STRIKE] the chip-enabled ID card [STRIKE]should[/STRIKE] needs to/has to work, but the [STRIKE]card[/STRIKE] chip doesn't work. Therefore, we request that you [STRIKE]to[/STRIKE] arrange for [STRIKE]the[/STRIKE] replacements cards with our RPS office.

In addition, Mr. Ivan's family's ID cards [STRIKE]has been[/STRIKE] expired last month.

In order to renew [STRIKE]their ID[/STRIKE] them, [STRIKE]firstly[/STRIKE] the address on Ivan's ID has to be updated. [STRIKE]based on their current residence address.[/STRIKE]

The address should be same for the head of the household [STRIKE]head[/STRIKE] and all family members otherwise (no semi-colon here) they will not be able to renew [STRIKE]it[/STRIKE] their cards.

Since they are all under special registration, we [STRIKE]request[/STRIKE] ask the RPS office to arrange for the renewal and replacement of their ID cards. [STRIKE]and replace all the ID cards which are not working.[/STRIKE]

Please [STRIKE]remember[/STRIKE] bear in mind that they can't do it [STRIKE]their own[/STRIKE] themselves as they are all under special registration.

See above.

 

[MAJSH]

Thank you very much for kind help

 

[emsr2d2]

Thank you very much for your kind help.

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