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  1. Newbie
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    #1

    Red face Please, help me check my motivation letter for grammar mistakes, Incomplete sentences

    To Whom It May Concern,
    I am writing to express my interest in the doctoral project “Operational planning under uncertainty in electrical power systems with a high share of intermittent renewable energy” in Energy System Engineering & System Analysis.
    I am particularly keen to apply for the doctoral program in this project as its research interests are an excellent match for my academic background. While studying for my master degree in “Renewable energy utilization in air conditioning system” at Alexandria University in Egypt. I’ve focused the majority of my studies in master degree on used renewable energy especial “Solar Energy” as a solar thermal energy using to regenerate the liquid desiccant LiCl instead of electricity. A liquid desiccant air handling machine is thermally modeled. A model is developed in TRNSYS using “C++ code” to predict the performance of the solar LDAC. System performance is evaluated for hot water temperature range between 70⁰ to 100⁰ and seen the results on required heating water flow rate, cooling water flow rate, LiCl solution flow rate, and thermal C.O.P. A mathematical model has been designed by MATLAB program according to the case study. One parameter has been changed to see the effect on the others parameters, also a relation between the required heating water flow rate and temperature to regenerate the weak solution and the area of the flat plate collector is studied BY TRNSYS Program.
    After completing my Master degree, I undertook a diploma in solar energy funded from TEMPUS at Faculty of science, El-Fayoum University. While studying there I studied Modeling and Simulation of solar photovoltaic / thermal System with POLYSUN program and came into contact with Andreas Wolf, who gave me an opportunity after finishing the diploma to be an official translator for POLYSUN from English to Arabic. I studied also; solar thermal systems and solar photovoltaic systems; which equipped me the newest systems use as CSP. This is leading me to search more about the latest technology of CSP, and I have found a lot of researches in Germany about CSP and a lot of seniors to transport electricity from MENA Region to Europe to solve the problems of fossil fuels in the coming decades.
    The best subject / project I have interested during the master & diploma was modeling and simulation to get the optimal design and operation. That is the main reason to select this program as depends on computer simulation and numerical optimization to arrive at an efficient, reliable and cost-effective solutions.
    I am confident that I can complete the research project which I have proposed, as I already have experience in Energy System Modeling. I believe that these skills and experience will allow me to complete a large-scale project like a Ph.D. effectively
    I now wish to continue my academic career with a Ph.D. in Renewable Energy, and I cannot imagine a better place to study this than HITEC. With the department's expertise in both Energy Systems Engineering, System Analysis, and Technology Evaluation, it would be the ideal location to improve my knowledge and expert in optimization design of solar energy
    This research has the potential to contribute to the academic understanding of optimal design in solar energy. With increasing levels of pollution and fossil fuels problems, the use of renewable energy become essentially to reduce the greenhouse gases effect.
    .After completing the Ph.D., I plan to pursue a postdoc placement within HITEC, likely in the area of simulation and optimization. Driven by a lifelong interest in renewable energy, simulation modeling, and numerical optimization. I am keen to continue my education in this subject and to perform my own research which can contribute to the knowledge of the field and transfer the knowledge to Egypt.
    Further, I wish to continue the studies in Germany in particular, as it is a world – leading in the use of Renewable Energy techniques, especially CSP tower witch located in Jülich. Also; there is a lot of scientific collaboration between Egypt and Germany now, where many projects planned to be established in Egypt soon in renewable energy “Solar Energy”.
    Many thanks for your consideration.



    Thanks for help
    Last edited by emsr2d2; 13-Nov-2018 at 16:32. Reason: Removed unnecessary line breaks before "Thanks for help".

  2. teechar's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: Please, help me check my motivation letter for grammar mistakes, Incomplete sente

    Quote Originally Posted by Shimaa Ismail View Post
    To Whom It May Concern,
    I am writing to express my interest in the doctoral project “Operational planning under uncertainty in electrical power systems with a high share of intermittent renewable energy” in Energy System Engineering & System Analysis. [What is that the name of?]

    I am particularly keen to apply for the doctoral program in this project as its research interests are an excellent match for my academic background. While studying for my master degree in “Renewable energy utilization in air conditioning system” at Alexandria University in Egypt. I’ve focused the majority of my studies in master degree on used renewable energy especial “Solar Energy” as a solar thermal energy using to regenerate the liquid desiccant LiCl instead of electricity. A liquid desiccant air handling machine is thermally modeled. A model is developed in TRNSYS using “C++ code” to predict the performance of the solar LDAC. System performance is evaluated for hot water temperature range between 70⁰ to 100⁰ and seen the results on required heating water flow rate, cooling water flow rate, LiCl solution flow rate, and thermal C.O.P. A mathematical model has been designed by MATLAB program according to the case study. One parameter has been changed to see the effect on the others parameters, also a relation between the required heating water flow rate and temperature to regenerate the weak solution and the area of the flat plate collector is studied BY TRNSYS Program.[Is/was that your own work/project?]

    After completing my Master degree, I undertook a [graduate?] diploma in solar energy funded from TEMPUS at Faculty of science, El-Fayoum University. While studying there I studied Modeling and Simulation of solar photovoltaic / thermal System with POLYSUN program and came into contact with Andreas Wolf [Who is he/she?] , who gave me an opportunity after finishing the diploma to be an official translator for POLYSUN from English to Arabic. I studied [where?] also; solar thermal systems and solar photovoltaic systems; which equipped me the newest systems use as CSP. This is leading me to search more about the latest technology of CSP, and I have found a lot of researches in Germany about CSP and a lot of seniors to transport electricity from MENA Region to Europe to solve the problems of fossil fuels in the coming decades.

    The best subject / project I have interested during the master & diploma was modeling and simulation to get the optimal design and operation. That is the main reason to select this program as depends on computer simulation and numerical optimization to arrive at an efficient, reliable and cost-effective solutions.
    I am confident that I can complete the research project which I have proposed, as I already have experience in Energy System Modeling. I believe that these skills and experience will allow me to complete a large-scale project like a Ph.D. effectively
    I now wish to continue my academic career with a Ph.D. in Renewable Energy, and I cannot imagine a better place to study this than HITEC. With the department's expertise in both Energy Systems Engineering, System Analysis, and Technology Evaluation, it would be the ideal location to improve my knowledge and expert in optimization design of solar energy

    This research has the potential to contribute to the academic understanding of optimal design in solar energy. With increasing levels of pollution and fossil fuels problems, the use of renewable energy become essentially to reduce the greenhouse gases effect.
    .After completing the Ph.D., I plan to pursue a postdoc placement within HITEC, likely in the area of simulation and optimization. Driven by a lifelong interest in renewable energy, simulation modeling, and numerical optimization. I am keen to continue my education in this subject and to perform my own research which can contribute to the knowledge of the field and transfer the knowledge to Egypt.
    Further, I wish to continue the studies in Germany in particular, as it is a world – leading in the use of Renewable Energy techniques, especially CSP tower witch located in Jülich. Also; there is a lot of scientific collaboration between Egypt and Germany now, where many projects planned to be established in Egypt soon in renewable energy “Solar Energy”.
    Many thanks for your consideration.

    Thanks for help
    Note the questions I wrote in square brackets. I also don't understand the text in blue.

  3. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: Please, help me check my motivation letter for grammar mistakes, Incomplete sente

    Also note that teechar has left an empty line between paragraphs. That makes it much easier to read than the big block of text you originally posted.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

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