Please correct below letter about lost item.

[happykhushishah]

Can Someone please correct the below letter and even add enhanced vocabulary where ever possible.

Dear Sir or Madam,

This letter is in reference to a lost of expensive personal item in Bombay express train.

I was travelling in Bombay Express train departing from Rajkot and arriving at Bombay on Nov 11th 2018. I boarded the train at bogie number S8 and seat number 45. Unfortunately I lost my cell phone in train.

Cell Phone was from apple manufacturing company of model iphone7. It is pink in color embedded in pink color case which has a label named "SaharaCase" at the bottom.I connected my phone to charger and placed on cell holder. Since I had to off board the train very early in the morning I forgot to take the phone from the stand.

I would really appreciate if you can look for the item. Please let me know if you have any additional concerns about the item. I am reachable at phone number XXXXX890.Looking forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,
khushi shah

 

[teechar]

Can Someone please correct the [Strike]below[/Strike] letter below and even add enhanced vocabulary wherever possible?

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing with regard to[Strike] This letter is in reference to a lost of[/Strike] an expensive personal item which I lost while travelling in on an [Strike]Bombay[/Strike] express train bound for Bombay.

I was travelling [Strike]in Bombay Express[/Strike] on the express train [Strike]departing[/Strike] from Rajkot [Strike]and arriving at[/Strike] to Bombay on Nov 11th 2018. I [Strike]boarded the train at bogie[/Strike] was on car number S8, and my seat number was 45. Unfortunately, I lost my cell phone [strike]in[/strike] on that train.

[Strike]Cell Phone was from apple manufacturing company of model[/Strike] It was an iPhone7, [Strike]. It is[/Strike] pink in color embedded in a pink [Strike]color[/Strike] case which has a label named "SaharaCase" at the bottom. I connected my phone to the charger and placed it on my cell holder. Since I had to [Strike]off board[/Strike] alight from the train very early in the morning, I forgot to take the phone from the stand.

I would really appreciate it if you can [STRIKE]look for[/STRIKE] help me find my phone. [Strike]the item.[/Strike] Please let me know if [Strike]you have any additional concerns about the[/Strike] anyone has handed in such an item. I am reachable at phone number XXXXX890.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,

khushi shah

Hello Kushi, and welcome to the forum.
I hope you can find your phone.

By the way, isn't it Mumbai nowadays instead of Bombay?

 

[emsr2d2]

It is pink [STRIKE]in color[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]embedded[/STRIKE] and is in a pink [STRIKE]color[/STRIKE] case [STRIKE]which has[/STRIKE] with a label [STRIKE]named[/STRIKE] marked/reading "SaharaCase" at the bottom.

Note my corrections to one specific sentence. My corrections differ a bit from teechar's.