need help in essay grammer and punctuation

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helpmesir

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dear teachers, kindly correct if finds any mistakes



Community Service

Community Service is something that doesn’t only improve us, it also benefits the broader public and that is the aim of my life, I want to do something for my community for my people.
“We have to do what we can to help wherever and whenever it is possible for us to help” - Jackie Chan
Almost 70 percent of the poor population lives in rural areas and almost all of them are involved in the farming sector. I want to pursue my specialization in agriculture so that I can reach out to the rural communities (specifically Mwanza Community) and help them to move away from traditional agricultural farming and promoting / educating them to apply organic / modern farming (Advance techniques).
That will boost agricultural sector which the backbone of national economy of Tanzania / Mwanza and this will help poor people to liver a better life.
“Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile” - Albert Einstein
 
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teechar

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Why are you writing that text? Is it part of a longer letter? If it is, can we see that letter?
 

emsr2d2

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Dear teachers, kindly correct any mistakes. [STRIKE]if finds any mistakes. [/STRIKE]

Please see my corrections above. However, there is no need to open with "Dear teachers". This is for two reasons:

1. It's overly formal. You're not writing a letter. Say "Hello" or just go straight into your question.
2. Not everyone who writes responses on the forum is a teacher. You will get great responses from teachers, native speakers and near-fluent non-native speakers.
 

Tarheel

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Community Service

"Community Service" is an obvious title for this one. As for the first sentence, the only problems are errors in punctuation. That's all for now.
 
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