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  1. #1
    alexpen is offline Junior Member
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    Weather swings

    Hello!

    I wonder if you would have a look at this piece of writing - actually, I want to voice it on a Youtube video about summer wardrobe essentials:


    One thing you need to know about our weather and our summer, in particular, is that we, here, live in a climate of extremes, of sharp weather swings. We do not typically have smooth transitions between the seasons. There are days, even weeks when the elements seem to be at odds: the sun blazing, the wind blustering. In a recent week, for instance, after a spell of oppressive heat, well over 30 degrees Celsius, we suddenly dropped below 20 and then went back up again. Another thing I would like to pinpoint is that, when all comes around, there is very little mellow summer weather with temperatures keeping in the 22-25 degrees’ range when you can put off all but one layer and really enjoy a warm, sunny day. In the middle of all our meteorological diversity, there is very little room for sporting your most basic long-sleeved shirts, blouses, dresses... Unless you put an extra layer for coldish weather, which is normal in spring and autumn. While, when it turns for summer, the sun starts glaring and the heat sets in quickly. Then you want nothing on your arms, for sure...


    I have set the places where I have been a bit creative with wordings in purple - I would like opinions on them: especially, if something does not read - or flow - well in English. Any other suggestions are also welcome, of course.

  2. #2
    Tarheel's Avatar
    Tarheel is offline VIP Member
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    Re: Weather swings

    Rather than pinpoint say point out. Rather than turns for summet say heats up. Rather than the sun starts glaring say heats up.

    Um, "when all comes around"?
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  3. #3
    teechar's Avatar
    teechar is offline Moderator
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    Re: Weather swings

    Quote Originally Posted by alexpen View Post
    Hello!

    I wonder if you would have a look at this piece of writing - actually, I want to voice it on a YouTube video about summer wardrobe essentials:

    One thing you need to know about our weather and our summer, in particular, is that we , here, live in a climate of extremes, of sharp weather swings. We do not typically have smooth transitions between the seasons. There are days, even weeks, when the elements seem to be at odds: the sun blazing, the wind blustering. In a recent week, For instance, recently after a spell of oppressive heat of well over 30 degrees Celsius, we the temperature suddenly dropped below 20 and then went back up again. Another thing I would like to pinpoint point out is that, when all comes around, more often than not, there is we get very little mellow reliable summer weather with temperatures keeping in the 22-25 degrees’ range when you can put off all but one layer and really enjoy a warm, sunny day. In the middle of all Therefore, given our meteorological diversity, there is very little room scant opportunity for sporting your most basic light long-sleeved shirts, blouses, and dresses unless you put an extra layer to keep you warm, for coldish weather, which is normal in spring and autumn. While, when it turns for However, in summer, the sun starts is glaring and the heat sets in quickly. Then you want nothing on your arms, for sure.

    I have set highlighted the places parts where I have been a bit creative with my wording in purple - I would like your opinions on them, especially if something does not read - or flow - well in English. Any other suggestions are also welcome, of course.
    .

  4. #4
    alexpen is offline Junior Member
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    Re: Weather swings

    Wow! Is this some kind of robot?

    I see seven or eight typos (corrected) that I did not make

    Not to mention some lack of logic...
    Last edited by alexpen; 02-Jul-2019 at 16:44.

  5. #5
    alexpen is offline Junior Member
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    Re: Weather swings

    Quote Originally Posted by Tarheel View Post
    Rather than pinpoint say point out
    Ok.

    Rather than turns for summet say heats up. Rather than the sun starts glaring say heats up. "?
    What about weather turns for summer? I do not want to use heat up twice.


    Um, "when all comes around"?
    = "all in all", " when things come around" - no?

  6. #6
    Tarheel's Avatar
    Tarheel is offline VIP Member
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    Re: Weather swings

    Use "heats up" once. Say: "when summer comes".
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  7. #7
    Tarheel's Avatar
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    Re: Weather swings

    The sun doesn't stare, and the sun doesn't glare. (Except in poetry.)
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  8. #8
    alexpen is offline Junior Member
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    Re: Weather swings

    I understand. Summer may come in May - I wanted to show that I meant the weather, not the time frame.

  9. #9
    alexpen is offline Junior Member
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    Re: Weather swings

    Quote Originally Posted by Tarheel View Post
    The sun doesn't stare, and the sun doesn't glare. (Except in poetry.)


    I've just checked the Merriam-Webster online, and the first definition it supplies is:

    to shine with a harsh uncomfortably brilliant light

    Synonymous with "blaze", which I also use.

  10. #10
    Tarheel's Avatar
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    Re: Weather swings

    OK
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