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  1. Senior Member
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    #11

    Re: Diary - summer day

    Quote Originally Posted by emsr2d2 View Post
    Try to rewrite "steam my legs". That verb doesn't work. Note that it should have been "steams" because the subject is "the heat".

    If all your blood was flowing out of your skin, you would be bleeding to death. That's not the same as melting.
    How about "dries my legs"?
    If I make any mistakes in English, please let me know! Please~~Thank you :)

  2. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #12

    Re: Diary - summer day

    Quote Originally Posted by Maybo View Post
    Hong Kong is summer now. I feel extremely hot. I don't even want to step out of my home but today I still went outside for lunch. When I am out, I always use an umbrella to block the sunlight because it hurts when I am in the sun. But even if I use the umbrella, the heat would reflect from the ground and then steam my legs. During the walk to having lunch, I felt like I was melting and dying; all my blood was flowing out of my skin. I already kept drinking water but that didn't help much as my head became painful. I couldn't imagine the 10-minute walk could do me a headache. Finally, I waited until sunset in the restaurant and went back home.
    Perhaps:

    It feels like my legs are baking

    And:

    During the walk to the restaurant it felt like I was baking

    (I know I already used that word once. I can't think of anything else. Besides, it's not a capital crime to do that.)

    And:

    I drank a lot of water, but I still got a headache

    And:

    I didn't think the ten-minute walk would give me a headache

    Finally, I would leave off Finally in the last sentence.
    Not a professional teacher

  3. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #13

    Re: Diary - summer day

    No. That suggests that your legs were previously wet (for no apparent reason) and that the sun dries them. It's hard to help you to reword it because we don't usually need to refer to the effect the sun has specifically on our legs.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

  4. Senior Member
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    #14

    Re: Diary - summer day

    Quote Originally Posted by emsr2d2 View Post
    No. That suggests that your legs were previously wet (for no apparent reason) and that the sun dries them. It's hard to help you to reword it because we don't usually need to refer to the effect the sun has specifically on our legs.
    I felt like the water in my skin evaporating quickly, and the water became visible like when we are cooking, we see the smoke. It's a bit exaggerating.
    If I make any mistakes in English, please let me know! Please~~Thank you :)

  5. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #15

    Re: Diary - summer day

    The water in your skin doesn't evaporate. (You would die.) The water on your skin (sweat) evaporates. When it doesn't you do, of course, become sweaty.
    Not a professional teacher

  6. Tarheel's Avatar
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    #16

    Re: Diary - summer day

    Quote Originally Posted by Maybo View Post
    I felt like the water in my skin evaporating quickly, and the water became visible like when we are cooking, we see the smoke. It's a bit exaggerating.
    Yes, it is a bit of an exaggeration.
    Not a professional teacher

  7. Key Member
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    #17

    Re: Diary - summer day

    The heat was so severe and dehydrating that I feel/saw moisture vaporizing/evaporating from my skin.
    Last edited by tedmc; 15-Jul-2019 at 04:33.
    I am not a teacher or a native speaker.

  8. teechar's Avatar
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    #18

    Re: Diary - summer day

    That's unnatural, and the tenses don't match.

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