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Thread: A swimming race

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    #1

    A swimming race

    This is a funny short story.

    A swimming race was held at a river where had a lot of crocodiles. The award for the winner is one million dollars. There were a lot of people standing on two banks of the river but no one dare join the race.
    A man suddenly jumped down the river and swam on it. He looked very afraid and his face was pale. The crocodiles chased after him but he swam very fast. He swam from this bank to the other bank. Finally, he run away from the crocodiles and reached the bank safely.
    After he got one million dollars, he said to his wife “Someone pushed me down the river”
    Please correct my mistakes.

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    #2

    Re: A swimming race

    NOT A TEACHER


    Hello, Chunchuntthn:

    I very much enjoyed your story. If I were to rewrite it, I would probably make a few changes to tighten it up and avoid unnecessary repetition.



    A swimming race was held in a crocodile-infested river.

    A lot of people were standing on both banks of the river, but no one dared to participate in the race.

    Suddenly a man jumped into the river and started swimming. His pale face showed that he was very afraid. Swimming very fast, he was able to get to the other side without being attacked by the crocodiles.

    After he was awarded the prize of one million dollars, he told his wife: "I had not planned to take part in the race, but someone pushed me into the river!"

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    #3

    Re: A swimming race

    Quote Originally Posted by chunchuntthn View Post
    This is a funny short story. (That's subjective! Even if it's true, there was no reason to place those words halfway across the line.)


    A swimming race was held at in a river where in which had there were a lot of crocodiles. The award prize for the winner is was one million dollars. There were A lot of people were standing on two the banks of the river but no one dared join the race.

    A man suddenly jumped down into the river and swam started swimming on in it. He looked very afraid and his face was pale. The crocodiles chased after him but he swam very fast. He swam from towards this one bank to and then the other. bank. Finally, he run away from managed to outpace the crocodiles and he reached the bank safely.

    After he got one million dollars received the money, he said to his wife “Someone pushed me down into the river!

    Please correct my mistakes.
    See above.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

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