Can someone help on the letter for application of MFIN( MASTER OF FINANCE)

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cc19

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Can someon help proof the letter below?Also, if there is any suggestion for Furture goal, it will be appreciated.

Dear Sir or Madam,


I am writing this letter to express my interest inapplying for the Master of Finance Program xxx starting in May 2020. Since I have a strong academic record and practicalwork experience in the finance and accounting industry, I believe that MFIN - aunique and practice-oriented master's program perfectly suits me and will help enhancemy knowledge base and skills as well as my career prospects.


In 2008, I completed a master's in Economics from xx. As a economics student, I got interested in obtaining afurther master's in finance to enhance my skills and capabilities. After thegraduation, I have been working for accounting firm for more than 10 years. Throughoutmy working experience, I have gained the CPA designation, and an extensiveinsight within this field. My key accounting and financial competenciesinclude, but are not limited to, maintaining financial records, risk assessmentand investment portfolios. In terms of the further professional goals, I amlooking for the position in the capital market.


I believe the Master of Finance Program at xx is perfect for me to study financial knowledge in a morein-depth and systematic way before realizing my dream. I am particularlyinterested in the courses Advanced Corporate Finance and Valuation because Ihave found them essential for me to flexibly navigate financial scenarios atwork. Besides, the curriculum is quite parallel to my ambitions as I want toimprove myself in interpreting financial statements, corporate governance andfinancial modelling. More exciting, MFIN program offers an internationallearning environment where I can gain the advantage to learn to cooperate withpeople from different backgrounds.


With these qualifications, I am confident that I am qualified and ableto perform well in this program. Having the possibility to study at youruniversity would be such a big accomplishment for me, meanwhile having thechance to build my future and possible career represents a huge milestone toreach.

Thank you for considering my application, and I look forward to yourreply.
Sincerely,
xx
 
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teechar

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cc19

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I made some updates and would you please be able to proofread ?

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this letter to express my interest inapplying for the Master of Finance Program at XXX University starting in June XXXX. Since I have a strong academic record and practicalwork experience in the finance and accounting industry, I believe that MFIN - aunique and practice-oriented master's program perfectly suits me and will help enhancemy knowledge base and skills as well as my career prospects.

In 2008, I completed a master's in Economics from XXX. After the graduation, I have been working for accountingfirm for more than 10 years. Throughout my working experience, I have gained theCPA designation, and an extensive insight within this field. My key accountingand financial competencies include, but are not limited to expressive of audit,tax and advisory experience primarily to financial and Technical companies andemerging market, intensive exposure to financial reporting and analysis and IPOprojects.

After years of working experience, I got interested in obtaininga further master's in finance to enhance my skills and capabilities in Financeindustry. After the graduation, I am looking for the corporate finance positionin the financial industry.

I believe the Master of Finance Program at XX is perfect for me to study financial knowledge in a morein-depth and systematic way before realizing my dream. I am particularlyinterested in the courses Advanced Corporate Finance and Valuation because Ihave found them essential for me to flexibly navigate financial scenarios atwork. Besides, the curriculum is quite parallel to my ambitions as I want toimprove myself in interpreting financial statements, corporate governance andfinancial modelling. More exciting, MFIN program offers an internationallearning environment where I can gain the advantage to learn to cooperate withpeople from different backgrounds.

With these qualifications, I am confident that I am qualified and ableto perform well in this program. Having the possibility to study at youruniversity would be such a big accomplishment for me, meanwhile having thechance to build my future and possible career represents a huge milestone toreach.

Thank you for considering my application, and I look forward to yourreply.
Sincerely,
XXX
 
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Tarheel

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Two things. One, note how I use my question marks. Do you see? Two, you would have to torture me to get me to use future goals.
 

cc19

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Hi , Would you please give me more details? how I can resolve your two questions?
 

emsr2d2

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cc19, please look at post 3. I have marked in red everywhere that pasting your text has caused spaces to go missing. Please use the "Edit Post" facility to add those spaces, then click "Save".
 

cc19

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I made some updates and would you please be able to proofread ? sorry I don't know how to edit, I replied here.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this letter to express my interest in applying for the Master of Finance Program at XXX University starting in June XXXX. Since I have a strong academic record and practical work experience in the finance and accounting industry, I believe that MFIN - a unique and practice-oriented master's program perfectly suits me and will help enhance my knowledge base and skills as well as my career prospects.

In 2008, I completed a master's in Economics from XXX. After the graduation, I have been working for accounting firm for more than 10 years. Throughout my working experience, I have gained the CPA designation, and an extensive insight within this field. My key accounting and financial competencies include, but are not limited to expressive of audit, tax and advisory experience primarily to financial and Technical companies and emerging market, intensive exposure to financial reporting and analysis and IPO projects.

After years of working experience, I got interested in obtaining a further master's in finance to enhance my skills and capabilities in Finance industry. After the graduation, I am looking for the corporate finance position in the financial industry.

I believe the Master of Finance Program at XX is perfect for me to study financial knowledge in a more in-depth and systematic way before realizing my dream. I am particularly interested in the courses Advanced Corporate Finance and Valuation because I have found them essential for me to flexibly navigate financial scenarios at work. Besides, the curriculum is quite parallel to my ambitions as I want to improve myself in interpreting financial statements, corporate governance and financial modelling. More exciting, MFIN program offers an international learning environment where I can gain the advantage to learn to cooperate with people from different backgrounds.

With these qualifications, I am confident that I am qualified and able to perform well in this program. Having the possibility to study at your university would be such a big accomplishment for me, meanwhile having the chance to build my future and possible career represents a huge milestone to reach.

Thank you for considering my application, and I look forward to your reply.
Sincerely,
XXX
 
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Tarheel

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Master's in Economics

an accounting firm

work experience
 

cc19

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would you please be able to proofread?
 

Tarheel

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The first paragraph looks OK.
 

cc19

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Hi, Can you please be able to help on following paragraphs ?
 

Tarheel

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I would say:

after graduating

O

after graduation
 
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