Page 1 of 2 1 2 Last
Results 1 to 10 of 17
  1. ayidh's Avatar
    Newbie
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Jun 2015
    • Posts: 19
    #1

    Information-requesting Letter

    Hello, folks. Hope you have been very well.

    Here is a piece of writing , or a letter requesting information from a company.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    With reference to your subsequent email containing the company’s request of information and photos of the previous architectural work undertaken in the village, and what procedures to (be)follow(ed) in this respect.

    We would like to remind and apprise you of the WAQ-RSG bilateral agreement stipulates that the first party “WAQ” is the only authorized (empowered) body (agent) to release the information and photos of the ongoing and previous architectural work.

    We suggest that you address the company and call/draw their attention to request those information and photos from”WAQ” by virtue of its ownership of the project of village.

  2. ayidh's Avatar
    Newbie
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Jun 2015
    • Posts: 19
    #2

    Re: Information-requesting Letter

    Any comments?

  3. Tarheel's Avatar
    VIP Member
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • American English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Jun 2014
    • Posts: 21,228
    #3

    Re: Information-requesting Letter

    There is no question in the OP.

    it's a letter.

    The first sentence is not a sentence.

    It is unclear what information is being requested.

    Use fewer words! Say what you mean.

    Don't use "those information" as it is not English.
    Not a professional teacher

  4. ayidh's Avatar
    Newbie
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Jun 2015
    • Posts: 19
    #4

    Re: Information-requesting Letter

    Quote Originally Posted by Tarheel View Post
    There is no question in the OP.

    it's a letter.

    The first sentence is not a sentence.

    It is unclear what information is being requested.

    Use fewer words! Say what you mean.

    Don't use "those information" as it is not English.
    With reference to your subsequent email about the AWA company requesting a piece of information and photos of the previous architectural work that had been previously undertaken in the village, and what procedures to (be)follow(ed) in this respect.

    We would like to remind and apprise you of the WAQ-RSG bilateral agreement stipulates that the first party “WAQ” is the only authorized (empowered) body (agent) to release such a piece of information and photos of the ongoing and previous architectural work.

    We suggest that you call/draw AWA company’s attention to direct and address their request to ”WAQ” by virtue of its ownership of the project of village.
    --------------------------
    Question:
    How expressive is this letter?
    Is it well-constructed?
    Any comments or recommendations to be added to the letter?

    Thanks heaps, Tarheel, for your help.

  5. Tarheel's Avatar
    VIP Member
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • American English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Jun 2014
    • Posts: 21,228
    #5

    Re: Information-requesting Letter

    Say:

    requesting information about and photos of ....

    The first "sentence" is not a sentence.

    It is unclear what you are trying to say.
    Not a professional teacher

  6. ayidh's Avatar
    Newbie
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Jun 2015
    • Posts: 19
    #6

    Re: Information-requesting Letter

    Thanks, Tarheel, for your patience.

    Thank you very much , A company, for your kind subsequent email about the AWA company, which has requested from you a piece of information and photos of the previous project that had been previously undertaken in the Dali village, and the procedures you have asked to (be)follow(ed) to respond to the A company.

    We would like to remind and apprise you of the WAQ-RSG bilateral agreement stipulates that the first party “WAQ” is the only authorized (empowered) body (agent) to release such a piece of information and photos of the ongoing and previous architectural work.

    We suggest that you ( A company ) call/draw AWA company’s attention to direct and address their request to ”WAQ” by virtue of its ownership of the project of the village.

  7. Tarheel's Avatar
    VIP Member
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • American English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Jun 2014
    • Posts: 21,228
    #7

    Re: Information-requesting Letter

    The first "sentence" is still not a sentence, but it's longer than ever.

    It seems that you don't want to say anything, and you do a very good job of that (saying nothing).

    You need to start from scratch. Write shorter, simpler sentences. Aim for clarity.

    I can't figure out what you're trying to say. Simplify!

    I hope you're not going to send that to anybody.
    Not a professional teacher

  8. ayidh's Avatar
    Newbie
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Jun 2015
    • Posts: 19
    #8

    Re: Information-requesting Letter

    With regard to your requesting us a piece of information on the previous project undertaken in the Dali village,
    We would like to remind and apprise you of the bilateral agreement, which we had already signed off with you, stipulates that we cannot furnish you with your request unless the project has been finished off.
    With our best wishes.

  9. Tarheel's Avatar
    VIP Member
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • American English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Jun 2014
    • Posts: 21,228
    #9

    Re: Information-requesting Letter

    Quote Originally Posted by ayidh View Post
    With regard to your requesting some information from us on the previous project undertaken in the Dali village,
    We would like to remind and apprise you of our agreement, which stipulates that we cannot honor your request until the project has been finished.
    With our best wishes.
    That's better!

    (It doesn't need to be mentioned that a contract is a bilateral agreement. That's what they are anyway.)
    Not a professional teacher

  10. ayidh's Avatar
    Newbie
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Jun 2015
    • Posts: 19
    #10

    Re: Information-requesting Letter

    Thanks, Tarheel.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tarheel View Post
    That's better!

    (It doesn't need to be mentioned that a contract is a bilateral agreement. That's what they are anyway.)
    I am aware of, but our language (Arabic) is flowery and seems to be longer, stuffed with past participle and piled with chunks of phrases as you do know of my translation.

Page 1 of 2 1 2 Last

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •