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  1. Junior Member
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    #1

    Lightbulb The incident of violence against woman

    Please correct my mistakes in my writing:

    The incident of violence against woman particularly rape, has increased significantly. A 15-year-old girl gang-raped by 4 youths on May 20. RAB arrested the accused. But after the arresting of that accused, the victim family is being threatened of dire consequences. The mother of the victim has informed this matter to Police. The sub-inspector of that area said they are investigating the case and also suggested the family to file a general diary in this regard. A 19-year-old woman took that girl to the party where she was served a drink spiked with sedatives. She was taken to a bush to rape after falling unconscious. One of the 3 arrestees whose name is Sujan recorded the whole incident on his phone and circulated that video on social media. That video made a huge outcry and it led to their eventual arrest. Those 4 accused including the woman were sought 5-day remand for each. Like this victim, many others don't have the courage to report against the rapist for fear of the attackers getting back at them.

  2. jutfrank's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: The incident of violence against woman

    Quote Originally Posted by Ador View Post
    The incident of violence against woman particularly rape, has increased significantly.
    This first sentence alone has multiple errors, of various kinds. Instead of someone here simply correcting all of your mistakes for you, it will be much more beneficial if we help you do it yourself.

    Start here: Look at the second word incident. This is the wrong word. You need a different word, which is in the same family but which has a different suffix.

    Next, look at the word woman. Do you want a singular or plural form here? Which form have you used?

    Next, look at the preposition against. I suggest you change this. Which other options do you have? How could you find out which one is best?

    Next, you should notice the conspicuous lack of punctuation before particularly. Have you studied punctuation before? Can you guess what kind of punctuation you need here?

  3. Junior Member
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    #3

    Re: The incident of violence against woman

    Quote Originally Posted by jutfrank View Post
    This first sentence alone has multiple errors, of various kinds. Instead of someone here simply correcting all of your mistakes for you, it will be much more beneficial if we help you do it yourself.

    Start here: Look at the second word incident. This is the wrong word. You need a different word, which is in the same family but which has a different suffix.

    Next, look at the word woman. Do you want a singular or plural form here? Which form have you used?

    Next, look at the preposition against. I suggest you change this. Which other options do you have? How could you find out which one is best?

    Next, you should notice the conspicuous lack of punctuation before particularly. Have you studied punctuation before? Can you guess what kind of punctuation you need here?
    Thanks, jutfrank. Following your suggestion, I think the correct sentence would be: The occurrence of violence against women, particularly rape, has increased significantly.

  4. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #4

    Re: The incident of violence against woman

    Quote Originally Posted by Ador View Post
    Thanks, jutfrank. Following your suggestion, I think the correct sentence would be: The occurrence of violence against women, particularly rape, has increased significantly.
    You didn't need to change "incident" to "occurrence" - jutfrank was suggesting that you change it to a word that's spelled very similarly to "incident". Try again. "violence against women" is correct.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

  5. Junior Member
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    #5

    Re: The incident of violence against woman

    Quote Originally Posted by emsr2d2 View Post
    You didn't need to change "incident" to "occurrence" - jutfrank was suggesting that you change it to a word that's spelled very similarly to "incident". Try again. "violence against women" is correct.
    The incidence of violence against women, particularly rape, has increased significantly.

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