Introducing a new acoustic guitar

[keannu]

Edit by moderator: The following was written by keannu's student and keannu is asking for our help in correcting it.

Topic : Introducing a new acoustic guitar

This acoustic guitar is just like new! I have an acoustic guitar for sale.
I bought it two years ago, and it was 160,000 won. It is brown outside and light brown inside.
It's 120cm long and 29~34 cm wide. I’m selling it for 50,000 won.

Please correct the mistakes.

 

[teechar]

Topic : Introducing a new acoustic guitar

Who are you "introducing" the guitar to?

It is brown outside and light brown inside.

What do you mean by "outside" and "inside"?

 

[keannu]

Who are you "introducing" the guitar to?

What do you mean by "outside" and "inside"?

Outside is the surface of the guitar while inside, inner part.

It's an introduction of the guitar to sell in a flea market.

 

[keannu]

Outside is the surface of the guitar while inside, inner part.

Does this sound awkward?

It is brown outside and light brown inside.

 

[tedmc]

This is probably clearer:

It is brown on the outside and light brown on the inside.

But then who bothers with what the colour is on the inside of a guitar?

 

[teechar]

Is the colour of the inside important?

 

[keannu]

Is the colour of the inside important?

I don't think so. This is my student's writing, so I'm only correcting it. It seems to be only for detailed description.

 

[emsr2d2]

I don't think so. This is my student's writing, so I'm only correcting it. It seems to be only for detailed description.

But you're not correcting it - we are! Why aren't you making the corrections yourself?

 

[Tarheel]

Ads tend to be brief. Perhaps:

Guitar for sale. Like new. Will take best offer.

I wouldn't bother with the dimensions or color. (Those who don't know what a guitar looks like won't be interested in buying one.)

Good to "see" you again, keannu!

 

[keannu]

But you're not correcting it - we are! Why aren't you making the corrections yourself?

I don't pass them on to you as they are. I correct it first and wait for your perfect review.
For the reason why I can't correct it, I will explain in the other thread.

 

[keannu]

Ads tend to be brief. Perhaps:

Guitar for sale. Like new. Will take best offer.

I wouldn't bother with the dimensions or color. (Those who don't know what a guitar looks like won't be interested in buying one.)

Good to "see" you again, keannu!

Good to see you again in a long time. I always appreciate your favor and help in my mind.

 

[emsr2d2]

I don't pass them on to you as they are. I correct it first and wait for your perfect review.
For the reason why I can't correct it, I will explain in the other thread.

To give us a better understanding of how you work, then, in future please show us the original version (your student's version) and your corrected version. It will be interesting to both you and us to see if we make the same corrections to your students' work that you do.