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  1. #11
    Mazid1989 is offline Newbie
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    Re: Motivation Letter Writing for PhD

    Quote Originally Posted by teechar View Post
    Write that extra paragraph, and I'll help you with the letter.
    I also note that you've posted a very similar version on at least one more forum.
    https://www.englishforums.com/Englis...pgrwx/post.htm

    Please do not post the same question simultaneously to more than one forum. Doing so wastes our valuable time. Instead, post your question to one forum and wait for replies. If you're not satisfied with those replies, you can try another forum, but please indicate in your thread that you've already asked the same question elsewhere (provide a link), and outline why you were not satisfied with the answers you received already.
    Ohh Sorry! Thanks for the suggestions.

  2. #12
    Mazid1989 is offline Newbie
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    Re: Motivation Letter Writing for PhD

    Unfortunately, I cannot edit my post.

  3. #13
    Tarheel's Avatar
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    Re: Motivation Letter Writing for PhD

    Quote Originally Posted by Mazid1989 View Post
    The Application deadline is in December. There is no word limit. I would highly appreciate your kind suggestions. The following topics should be included..
    1. Why are you interested in this project?
    2. What is your motivation for PhD?
    3. Why do you think you are suitable for this project?
    4. Is this project compatible with your long-range career plans?
    See above.
    Not a professional teacher

  4. #14
    teechar's Avatar
    teechar is offline Moderator
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    Re: Motivation Letter Writing for PhD

    Quote Originally Posted by Mazid1989 View Post
    Unfortunately, I cannot edit my post.
    Post the extra paragraph below.

  5. #15
    Mazid1989 is offline Newbie
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    Re: Motivation Letter Writing for PhD

    Here is the complete Essay. I hope this time it is okay...............

    Thank you for reading my letter. I am taking this opportunity to express my motivation to be a candidate for the PhD position in the project “Role of c-Maf expressing regulatory T cells in cancer immunosuppression” under your supervision at the Laboratory of Immunology of ULB. I introduce myself as a graduate from University of Antwerp, Belgium;where I pursued Master’s in Comparative Morphology under the Erasmus Mundus Scholarship. Passion for being a researcher is in my DNA, I figured it out early of my academic life when I realized that I only feel immense happiness if I can outperform in the academic results and when I can solve a question about complex biological system of our body that emanates in my thought spontaneously when the curiosity get better of me to understand it. Indeed, this intense enthusiasm of exploring the hidden unearthed things of our body directed my career path towards the challenge of PhD.

    Since my under graduation I found Immunology as a highly fascinating and interesting field. I remember the feelings of wonder,excitement and amazement the first time Immune system was explained to me during the Immunology course of undergraduate study in Doctor of Veterinary Medicine. It was only then did I truly appreciate how nature created the animal body and made a defence system that protects us from millions of microorganisms surrounding us. My amazement grew over time and I was inspired to continue my study as a Master’s student in the Department of Pathology after finishing graduation with top second rank. In the Immunopathology course, I got to know the details about regulatory T cell while making a critical analysis of a review article “The tumour microenvironment in B cell lymphomas” as a part of the course assignment. I was astonished to know that some cells of the immune system evolved to suppress the defensive function of other cells even favour the tumor progression. Albeit my master’s dissertation “----------------” dealt with the pathological lesions of a viral infection but not directly related to immunology, I wanted to conduct immunohistochemical analysis to locate the viral particles in the tissue and to investigate the immune cellular action against the virus, but due to the limitation of funding and laboratory equipments, I had to be disappointed.

    Meanwhile, I got the privilege to study in European Master’s program in the field of Biomedical Science. Here I had the opportunity to enhance my knowledge in basic life science topics, particularly exposure to the exclusive lectures by Prof. Steven van Chruchten on the molecular regulations of embryo fetal development introduced me to the proteins and signalling molecules which are responsible for cell cycle, cell growth, proliferation, differentiation and organogenesis. This course provided me the clue that the functions of cells are regulated by the different signalling molecules whose abnormalities consequence disease progression including cancers. Collectively reckoning my theoretical knowledge and academic background, I carefully pondered over my interest and determined my focus on tumor immunology for doing higher degree research. I materialized it while choosing my dissertation topic that was hosted at the Laboratory of Cell Biology under the Department of Molecular Medicine and Medical Biotechnology of the University of Napoli, Italy. The dissertation project focused on understanding the STING (Stimulator of Interferon Gene) signalling pathway; a gene recently emerged as an important protein having regulatory role in Innate Immunity, Autoimmune diseases and Cancer Immunity. My responsibility was to make STING knockout from THP1 cells using CRISPR/Cas9 mediated Lentiviral Transduction procedure and to study the effect of STING in monocyte to macrophage differentiation after treating with PMA. While working on this thesis, I studied a lot about cancer immunity and immunotherapeutic approaches and discovered that the immunosuppressive microenvironment is the major obstacle for successful immunotherapy and regulatory T cell is the major contributor of immunosuppressive microenvironment. Ultimately, this thesis work has developed an unquenchable interest to follow my PhD research on TReg cells in order to further extend the knowledge about it. Therefore, getting an opportunity to pursue my PhD in this topic would be a great advantage to implement my career goal.

    I feel that I have required knowledge, skills and expertise to contribute to this project. Apart from the knowledge of the latest scientific advancement on regulatory T cells that I follow regularly by reading published articles, I could offer my CRISRPR/Cas9 gene editing skills,DNA/RNA extraction, PCR, Gel Electrophoresis, SDS-PAGE, Flow cytometry and Immunofluorescence skills as well as the experience of hematopoietic and stem cell culture techniques that I got during Internship at the Justus Leibig Universitat Giessen, Germany. In return, I will have the avail of adding single cell transcriptomics and imaging techniques in my skill sets. In this opportunity, as a young scientist, with the availability of top-level research facilities offered, opportunity to present my work in scientific seminars, close contact and networking with the world renowned researchers and scientists, I will have deep experiences to exploit and use many advanced knowledge and skills to pursue future research on Tumor and immune cell cross talk.

    In mypast academic achievements, I demonstrated myself as an excellent researcher. I attained more than 85% marks in both the Master thesis I conducted before. I have two scientific publications in peer reviewed journals. I was always among the top 5% achievers in the final academic result. Besides, I am highly flexible, committed and responsible to my work. I am the person who likes to take the leadership of the work, feel as an entrepreneur and whose mistake or irresponsibility will have a big impact in the society. My biggest strength is the critical thinking ability, punctuality and the ability to work under pressure to meet the deadlines. Moreover, the joined European Masters Program in four Universities of the four different European countries have increased my communication and collaborative skills to unknown heights that your lab could get certain advantages.

    Lastly, from the afore-mentioned criteria, allow me to express that I deserve to be a member of your team. I want to take this PhD as an opportunity to make substantial progress towards my career goal of being an Academician. After PhD, I want to continue as a post doc to explore further about reg T cell biology. I would appreciate the opportunity for a personal interview to discuss my backgroundand expertise as well as the project in more detail. Please take my appreciation and gratitude for your further assessment and consideration.
    Last edited by emsr2d2; 13-Nov-2020 at 18:49. Reason: Typo (Rover); Enlarged font (emsr2d2)

  6. #16
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Re: Motivation Letter Writing for PhD

    Since my under graduation I found Immunology as a highly fascinating and interesting field. I remember the feelings of wonder,excitement and amazement
    For me, this is trying too hard- cramming sentences with positive words like this is not proof of sincerity, no matter how good the intention.

    From my undergraduate days, I have been fascinated by Immunology.
    That's enough for me.

  7. #17
    Tarheel's Avatar
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    Re: Motivation Letter Writing for PhD

    Say:

    Here is the complete essay. I hope it is okay.

    It is loaded with extra words. That makes for tedious reading.

    Have you considered getting professional help?
    Last edited by Rover_KE; 13-Nov-2020 at 08:48. Reason: fixing typo
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  8. #18
    teechar's Avatar
    teechar is offline Moderator
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    Re: Motivation Letter Writing for PhD

    I wish to apply for the PhD position in the “Role of c-Maf expressing regulatory T cells in cancer immunosuppression” project under your supervision at the Laboratory of Immunology of ULB. I graduated from the University of Antwerp in 2018 with a master’s degree in comparative morphology under the Erasmus Mundus Scholarship. I realized that research is my passion early in my academic life. Indeed, my intense enthusiasm for exploring the hidden secrets of our body directed my career path towards the challenge of a PhD.

    To me, immunology is a highly fascinating and interesting field, and I was inspired to continue my study as a master’s student in the Department of Pathology - Antwerp University after graduating with a 2-1 degree. In the Immunopathology course, I learned in detail about regulatory T cells while making a critical analysis of a review article “The tumour microenvironment in B cell lymphomas” as a part of the course assignment. I was astonished to know that some cells of the immune system evolved to suppress the defensive function of other cells, even favouring the progression of tumours. Although my master’s dissertation “----------------” dealt with the pathological lesions of a viral infection, not directly related to immunology, I wanted to conduct immunohistochemical analysis to locate the viral particles in the tissue and to investigate the immune cellular action against the virus, but due to the limitation of funding and laboratory equipment, I could not.

    In 2019, I was privileged to be accepted in the ABCD Program in the field of biomedical science. Here, I had the opportunity to enhance my knowledge in basic life science topics, particularly through lectures by Prof. Steven van Chruchten on the molecular regulations of embryo-fetal development. That introduced me to the proteins and signalling molecules which are responsible for cell cycle, cell growth, proliferation, differentiation and organogenesis. I learned that the functions of cells are regulated by the different signalling molecules whose abnormalities cause diseases such as cancer. I decided to do my further studies in tumor immunology. while choosing my dissertation topic that was hosted at the Laboratory of Cell Biology under the Department of Molecular Medicine and Medical Biotechnology of the University of Napoli, Italy.
    I stopped because I couldn't understand how that underlined part fits in. Please do not complicate your sentences. This is not an exercise in fine literature!
    Clarify that underlined part and consider simplifying what follows too. Do not change anything above the underlined part, except the text in red.

  9. #19
    Mazid1989 is offline Newbie
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    Re: Motivation Letter Writing for PhD

    Quote Originally Posted by teechar View Post
    I stopped because I couldn't understand how that underlined part fits in. Please do not complicate your sentences. This is not an exercise in fine literature!
    Clarify that underlined part and consider simplifying what follows too. Do not change anything above the underlined part, except the text in red.

    Great!! Thanks a lot. I needed something like this to make it simplified.

  10. #20
    teechar's Avatar
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    Re: Motivation Letter Writing for PhD

    OK. Fix it and post the amended version below.

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