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  1. #1
    rodgers white is offline Senior Member
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    ...mark the passage...

    Hi there. Would you please proofread the following text? Any help would be appreciated.

    ************************************************** ******************************************

    There was still about an hour of daylight left when they arrived at the cave, but unlike the cave they had used as a refuge from the meteorite impact, the entrance to this cave was small. Crouching low, they entered the cave one at a time, and like the other cave, this one also led to a much larger cavern beyond.

    Once inside, Gan and Jingying went straight to the side cave they had used previously. Gan said. “It seemed like so long ago, but being here now, it seems like yesterday; there is not even any dust to mark the passage of time. Yang was born in this cave.”

    Jingying was reminiscing too. “It was the happiest moment of my life in a time that was filled with the sadness of having to leave our home, but to be honest, I am happy in our new home and to be with our new people.”

    Gan smiled and nodded. He was looking for a place to put his journal and had found a crevice in the wall at head-height that he thought would be a safe place. “Here, this seems good enough.”

    Jingying looked for herself and nodded. “Yes, I think that will do nicely.”
    Last edited by rodgers white; 22-Mar-2021 at 12:33.
    Three passions have governed my life: the longing for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind.

  2. #2
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Re: ...mark the passage...

    Can you crouch high?

  3. #3
    Charlie Bernstein's Avatar
    Charlie Bernstein is offline VIP Member
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    Re: ...mark the passage...

    Quote Originally Posted by rodgers white View Post
    Hi there. Would you please proofread the following text? Any help would be appreciated.

    ************************************************** ******************************************

    There was still about an hour of daylight left when they arrived at the cave, but unlike the cave they had used as a refuge from the meteorite impact, the entrance to this cave was small. Crouching low, they entered the cave one at a time. Like the other cave, this one also led to a much larger cavern beyond.

    Once inside, Gan and Jingying went straight to the side cave they had used previously. Gan said, “It seemed like so long ago, but being here now, it seems like yesterday; there is not even any dust to mark the passage of time. Yang was born in this cave.”

    Jingying was reminiscing too. “It was the happiest moment of my life in a time that was filled with the sadness of having to leave our home, but to be honest, I am happy in our new home and to be with our new people.”

    Gan smiled and nodded. He was looking for a place to put his journal and had found a crevice in the wall at head-height that he thought would be a safe place. “Here, this seems good enough.”

    Jingying looked for herself and nodded. “Yes, I think that will do nicely.”
    Run-ons.
    I'm not a teacher. I speak American English. I've tutored writing at the University of Southern Maine and have done a good deal of copy editing and writing, occasionally for publication.

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