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  1. #1
    rodgers white is offline Senior Member
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    ...to cultivate flowers...

    Hi there. Would you please proofread the following text? Any help would be appreciated.

    ************************************************** *******************************************

    Since the Meteor strike, hunting near the valley was poor. So, hunting parties decided to leave a ten-kilometre swath of unhunted grounds around the valley for twelve months in the hope of speeding up the return of said wildlife. Hunting was much harder, but in the end, it would prove to be worth it.

    Gan and Jingying soon set out towards their old home with about twenty volunteers, including Bailian, Ganís runner during the evacuation. Bailian had never left the valley except for the time in the cave during the meteor strike. So she was eager for a chance to explore outside the valley even farther.

    Bailian was from a farming family; her father had never put her to work on the farm itself but used her to run messages to and from her mother; when not running, she had taught herself to cultivate flowers and new varieties of vegetables and fruits. The running skills had, of course, developed from her job as a message carrier.
    Three passions have governed my life: the longing for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind.

  2. #2
    Tarheel's Avatar
    Tarheel is offline VIP Member
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    Re: ...to cultivate flowers...

    Quote Originally Posted by rodgers white View Post
    Hi there. Would you please proofread the following text? Any help would be appreciated.

    ************************************************** *******************************************

    Since the meteor strike, hunting near the valley had been poor. So, hunting parties decided to leave a ten-kilometre swath of unhunted grounds around the valley for twelve months in the hope of speeding up the return of said wildlife. Hunting was much harder, but in the end, it would prove to be worth it.

    Gan and Jingying soon set out towards their old home with about twenty volunteers, including Bailian, Ganís runner during the evacuation. Bailian had never left the valley except for the time in the cave during the meteor strike. So she was eager for a chance to explore outside the valley even farther.

    Bailian was from a farming family; her father had never put her to work on the farm itself but used her to run messages to and from her mother; when not running, she had taught herself to cultivate flowers and new varieties of vegetables and fruits. The running skills had, of course, developed from her job as a message carrier.
    That's an unusual group of people.
    Not a professional teacher

  3. #3
    tedmc is offline VIP Member
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    Re: ...to cultivate flowers...

    I wouldn't use a second semi-colon in the last paragraph.
    I am not a teacher or a native speaker.

  4. #4
    tedmc is offline VIP Member
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    Re: ...to cultivate flowers...

    Here are some tips on the use of multiple semi-colons in a sentence.
    I am not a teacher or a native speaker.

  5. #5
    Tarheel's Avatar
    Tarheel is offline VIP Member
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    Re: ...to cultivate flowers...

    Taking a second look, I wouldn't use any semicolons in that paragraph. Perhaps:

    Bailian was from a farming family. Her father had never put her to work on the farm, but instead he used her to run messages to and from her mother. When she wasn't running she taught herself to cultivate flowers and new varieties of fruits and vegetables. The running skills had, of course, developed from her job as a message carrier.

    It seems like a very unlikely story, but it is fiction after all.
    Not a professional teacher

  6. #6
    Tom Carter's Avatar
    Tom Carter is offline Newbie
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    Re: ...to cultivate flowers...

    Sorry, I'm on the forum recently. And I noticed that there are often topics where they check for grammar and spelling. I'm also writing an essay now, and I'm not a native speaker, I'm just learning. So he himself ordered several times from Eduzaurus - guidance, writing inspiration supportive materials, and proofreading of the text. But here they can do it for free ?? How long can a text be sent for such proofreading? I will be very grateful to you for your answer.

  7. #7
    probus's Avatar
    probus is offline Moderator
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    Re: ...to cultivate flowers...

    I regret to say, Tom, that I can't understand exactly what your question is. It might help if you restated it. Try using short simple sentences.

  8. #8
    jutfrank's Avatar
    jutfrank is offline VIP Member
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    Re: ...to cultivate flowers...

    Quote Originally Posted by Tom Carter View Post
    I'm not a native speaker, I'm just learning.
    Could you amend the information in your profile, please? Thanks.

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