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  1. #1
    Philemon Gedzie-Dunyoh is offline Just Joined
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    Correction of errors

    Help me with editing the following
    At sixty,the director prevailed on his deputy to retire

  2. #2
    tedmc is offline VIP Member
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    Re: Correction of errors

    Quote Originally Posted by Philemon Gedzie-Dunyoh View Post
    Help me with editing the following
    At sixty,the director prevailed on his deputy to retire

    Prevailed on
    is not the right phrase. I would use persuaded.
    I am not a teacher or a native speaker.

  3. #3
    Tdol is offline Editor, UsingEnglish.com
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    Re: Correction of errors

    Who was sixty?

  4. #4
    Charlie Bernstein's Avatar
    Charlie Bernstein is online now VIP Member
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    Re: Correction of errors

    Quote Originally Posted by Philemon Gedzie-Dunyoh View Post
    Help me with editing the following:

    At sixty, [space] the director prevailed on his deputy to retire.
    Welcome, Phil!

    Tdol asks a good question. The director's age should not be the issue. Do you see the problem? Can you think of a way to rephrase?

    ALWAYS punctuate the ends of sentences.
    Last edited by Charlie Bernstein; 21-Apr-2021 at 04:04.
    I'm not a teacher. I speak American English. I've tutored writing at the University of Southern Maine and have done a good deal of copy editing and writing, occasionally for publication.

  5. #5
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is offline Moderator
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    Re: Correction of errors

    Quote Originally Posted by Philemon Gedzie-Dunyoh View Post
    Please help me with editing to edit/correct the following sentence.

    At sixty, space here the director prevailed on his deputy to retire.
    Welcome to the forum.

    Please note my corrections above.

    1. Just saying "Help me" is impolite. You need to say "Please".
    2. Ask people to help you "to + verb" or "with + noun/pronoun".
    3. End every sentence with an appropriate punctuation mark.
    4. Put a space after every comma, full stop, question mark and exclamation mark.

    Your sentence is unclear. As Tdol pointed out, using "At sixty, the director ..." means that the director was sixty, not the deputy. As tedmc said, "prevailed on" (note that it's usually "prevail upon") is the wrong choice. Perhaps you mean "persuaded" or "encouraged".

    Did you write this sentence yourself or did you find it somewhere?
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

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