John stepped into the kitchen.

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alpacinou

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Is this correct and natural?

John stepped into the kitchen. Nicole was scrubbing the stove. "I'm cleaning the goddamn mess you made with your cooking, John," she said over her shoulder.

"Honey, I found something you like in the attic," said John, handing her an old book.

Nicole looked at the book with tepid enthusiasm. "And what makes you think this is something I like? It's not even mine!" She tossed the book into the garbage bin.

John's face deflated.

"You are just about the most useless husband in the world, darling" said Nicole. "I should auction you off to the highest bidder."
 

Tarheel

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John walked into the kitchen. Nicole was scrubbing the stove. "I'm cleaning the goddamn mess you made with your cooking, John," she said over her shoulder.

"Honey, I found something you like in the attic," John said.

Nicole looked at the book blankly. "What makes you think this is something I like? It's not even mine!" She tossed the book into the garbage bin.

[STRIKE]John's[/STRIKE] John felt deflated.

"You are just about the most useless husband in the world, darling" said Nicole. "I should auction you off to the highest bidder."

I don't see him handing her the book. She's been cleaning the stove.
 
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emsr2d2

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If you're concentrating on BrE, don't use "garbage bin". It's a mash-up of BrE and AmE. In the USA, it's a "garbage can". In the UK, it's a "rubbish bin" or just a "bin".

I have no problem with "stepped" in the first sentence.
I would keep the part about "the old book" because it introduces the book you mention in the next sentence. However, I would say "showing" instead of "handing" for the same reason as Tarheel. I don't think he'd give it to her if she was in the middle of cleaning something.
I would have kept "And" before "what makes you think". It's a common opening to such a query.
His face definitely didn't deflate! Balloons deflate!
 
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