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  1. #1
    alpacinoutd is offline Key Member
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    when a person sleeps in another person's arms

    A man and a woman is laying on a bed. She puts her head on his chest. He listens to her breathing until she falls sleep. How can I express the sound of breathing turns to sleep? Do I have to use the word snore? Are there other ways?

    Later that night, Amanda and Jack lay on the bed. Her head was nestled against his chest. He listened to the sound of her breathing turn to a light snore. He wondered what she was dreaming about.
    Last edited by alpacinoutd; 04-May-2021 at 21:34.

  2. #2
    Charlie Bernstein's Avatar
    Charlie Bernstein is offline VIP Member
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    Re: when a person sleep in another person's arms

    Quote Originally Posted by alpacinoutd View Post
    A man and a woman are lying in bed. She puts her head on his chest. He listens to her breathing until she falls sleep. How can I express the sound of breathing as she falls asleep? Do I have to use the word snore? Are there other ways?

    Later that night, Amanda and Jack lay on the bed. Her head was nestled against his chest. He listened to the sound of her breathing turn to a light snore. He wondered what she was dreaming about.
    Using snore is fine if she's snoring. if she's not, just describe how her breathing changes or describe how he knows she's asleep.

    In bed and on the bed have different connotations.

    If they're on top of the covers and dressed, then they're on the bed. If not, they're in bed.
    I'm not a teacher. I speak American English. I've tutored writing at the University of Southern Maine and have done a good deal of copy editing and writing, occasionally for publication.

  3. #3
    alpacinoutd is offline Key Member
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    Re: when a person sleep in another person's arms

    Quote Originally Posted by Charlie Bernstein View Post
    Using snore is fine if she's snoring. if she's not, just describe how her breathing changes or describe how he knows she's asleep.
    Thank you Charlie. Could you please offer some examples?

  4. #4
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    Charlie Bernstein is offline VIP Member
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    Re: when a person sleep in another person's arms

    Quote Originally Posted by alpacinoutd View Post
    Thank you Charlie. Could you please offer some examples?
    Just take a crack at it. He knew she had fallen asleep because . . . .
    I'm not a teacher. I speak American English. I've tutored writing at the University of Southern Maine and have done a good deal of copy editing and writing, occasionally for publication.

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