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    • Join Date: Dec 2006
    • Posts: 49
    #1

    plz check

    Topic: No her generation has experienced as many as opportunities as many test of strength as ours.

    The Present young generation is always different from old generation. There are many ways in which both generations are different. This difference does not mean that one is good and THE other is bad. Both generations have some negative and positive aspects. In my view, these are the following things in which both generations are different.

    Today generation is completely based on computers. THE Present generation very well know the use of the internet and chatting on computers. Youngster mostly prefers the use of computers. But old generation do not depend on computers. In fact, I would like to say most of them do not know HOW to operate computers. Today generation has forgotten letter writing. They are using only e-mails. But previous generation is still using letter writing. Other thing I would like to discuss about teenagers Is that nowdays teens are using mobile and other electronic items like IPOD, MP3 etc. On the other hand, old generation is still using land line connections and other simple instruments. Older people are not crazy ABOUT these electronic DEVICES.

    What I like the most in old generation is that they know how to make the relationships in family and neighbourhood. But todayís generation do not have that quality. THE Present generation always thinks about itself and only OF family members. THE Present generation do not think ABOUT their relatives and neighbours. They are globalized but old generation used to pass their whole life at one place. They do only one type of job. They donít like any change in their living. Our young generation have the habit to study and get knowledge. Therefore, we find good opportunities to progress in life. Wherever, the present generation finds a better job they ARE ready to go. If we see the ratio of people who go abroad, we will find it to be higher for the present generation as compared to our parentsí generation.

    Finally I would like to say there are many differences in both generations. But it will be good, if we learn good things from old generation and old generation learn from THE younger generation. This will be good not only for a person and a family but also for the progress of a country.


  1. #2

    Re: plz check

    Topic: Her generation has not experienced as many opportunities and as many tests of strength as ours.

    The present young generation is always different from the old generation. There are many ways in which both generations are different. This difference does not mean that one is good and the other is bad. Both generations have negative and positive aspects. In my view, these are the following things in which both generations are different.

    Today's generation is completely based on computers. This generation knows very well how to use the internet and how to chat on line. Youngsters mostly prefers the use of computers.

    But the old generation do not depend on computers. In fact, I would like to say most of them do not know how to use a computer.

    Today's generation has forgotten letter writing. While the previous generation is still writing letters and using land line telephones, the youngsters are using mobile phones, texting their friends and sending emails. They are also enjoying the benefits of technology such as IPODs and MP3 players. The older generation are not too bothered about keeping up with technology.

    What I like the most in the old generation is that they know how to make the relationships work in the family and the neighbourhood. But today’s generation do not have that quality. The present generation always thinks about itself and only of family members. The present generation do not think about their relatives and neighbours.

    While the younger generation are tapping into the 'Global Village', the old generation are used to passing their whole life in one place. They do only one type of job and they don’t like any change in their lives. The young generation want to study and get qualifications so they can find good opportunities to progress in life.

    Whenever the young generation finds a better job they are raring to go. If we see the ratio of people who go abroad, we will find it to be higher for the present generation as compared to our parents’ generation.

    Finally, I would like to say there are many differences in both generations. But it will be good if we learn good things from the older generation and in turn if they also learn from the younger generation. This will be good not only for a person and a family but also for the progress of a country.

    I have corrected your passage.

    You need to be careful with your articles (the, a) and you don't need to put things in capitals, unless it is a proper noun (place name, trade name, official title, etc) or the beginning of a sentence.

    Try to wrap issues into paragraphs rather than put more than one issue into one long paragraph. Maximum three or four sentences per paragraph. You don't have to compete with Charles Dickens, thankfully, these days.

  2. rancher247's Avatar
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    • Join Date: Jan 2007
    • Posts: 275
    #3

    Re: plz check

    "Try to wrap issues into paragraphs rather than put more than one issue into one long paragraph. Maximum three or four sentences per paragraph. You don't have to compete with Charles Dickens, thankfully, these days."
    I don't want to detract from what you've posted, but I disagree on behalf of my education programs. In my classes, a good paragraph in an expository or persuasive essay has one major topic which is stated in the topic sentence. Then there are three supporting points which are, in turn, supported in the paragraph with quotes (which should be ICE'd-Introduced, Cited, and then Explained), facts, or a personal explanation of the smaller point. The paragraph also needs to have a conclusionary sentence which sums up the paragraph and introduces the next paragraph's idea/topic. Each paragraph would likely contain at least eight sentences.

  3. #4

    Re: plz check

    I'm explaining the accepted usage of Plain English. If this is not taught to foreign students then I apologize.

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