Results 1 to 4 of 4

    • Join Date: Mar 2007
    • Posts: 3
    • Post Thanks / Like


    Hello, i didn't really know where i have to write my problem so i choosed this this thread.
    I'm in the 9th class(Germany) and i'll wirte a classtest tomorrow, where i have to write 2 texts. First one is about childlabour, second about Industrial Revolution. I just finished my texts, but i don't know where i have done mistakes. Could you please check my 2 textes, correct and send it back to me? It would be vvverrryyyy nice! Here they are

    I think the sentence on the board isn't true. There are many parts of the world where childlabour is Agenda(Tagesordnung) for example Africa and India. The children there must work to survive and to support the family. They work under hard conditions, which we can't imagine. They stand up very early in the morning and work till night. In some cases even up 18 hours a day. They get ilnesses, which can be Critically for example in wool industry the children get worse cough. In mines the children have to work in the dark, where they can quite see nothing. That's very bad for the eyes and the children can get blind. If they fall asleep or they don't work so hard, they get beaten by the owners who are very strict. For their very strong work they get only a little money which they need for their family. On top of that there often cases, where the children die. In the 18th century Richard Oastler, also named "King of Facotry children" exerted himself(setze sich dafür ein), that childlabour should be forbidden and with some obstacles(Hindernissen) he also reached his goal, so that now European has no child labour. The Teenagers there can work only if the want to. There are much better conditions and they musn't work so long. They have more freetime and can do other things. They earn more money, and in the most cases they don't use it to support the family. You can call it earning extra pocket money. My opinion to this subject is very clearly. Childlabour should be forbidden, but what can the poor familys do to norish(ernähren) themselves. That's a big problem and the state should help them. But I'm very happy that childlabour is forbidden in our country.

    Industrial Revolution:
    There are many important things, The Industrial Revolution changed. Before The Industrial Revolution, most goods were made by hand. But in the 18 th century manufacturers started to build factories, especially in the north of England. So they produced the goods more efficientliy, much cheaper and faster. The factories needed worker and so countrys turned into big citiys e.g. Sheffield, Leeds. The machines used natural power( water, wind, animals, human being) but there were soon limited. In the 18th century the steam eingine was ivented, but it wasn't very efficient. In 1769 James Wott(Scottish engineer) found ways to improve them. Until the 18th century, Britain's main fuel was wood, but wood didn't burn so hot to make iron and steel. So people looked for other fuels, for example coal. However coal burned hotter and it was mined for centuries. So they used coal to make iron and steel, which improved the work of the manufacturers. They used a trick to get people out of the land into the cities to work in the industrys. The rich took more pieces of land, and so the poor people lost their areas and had to move to citys. After that the factory owners looked for better ways to transport the goods. In the 18th century, they built canals linked all towns over Britan, which made the transport faster and cheaper. In the 19th century the railways was the greatest development and later George Stephenson invent a locomotive, named Rocket, which had a speed of 36 miles per hour. Now I tell you something about the dark side of the Industrial Revolution. The people had relied on the steel industry for jobs over two hundred years, suddenly they had to look elsewhere for jobs, when the steelworks in the 1970s and 80s closed. But the smog which was all over the valley disappeared, so the people built some other tourist attractions like Meadowhell to get money. In the end my opinion to the Industrial Revolution is, that it was very great to produce the goods so fast and cheap, but when closing so much people were out of work, I didn't found it very nice.

    Thx for your help

    • Join Date: Mar 2007
    • Posts: 3
    • Post Thanks / Like

    Re: Text

    Thank You for your help Queen Bu. Now can you please correct the text "industrial Revolution" and send it again to me. That would be very nice.

  1. queenbu's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Maltese
      • Home Country:
      • Malta
      • Current Location:
      • Italy

    • Join Date: Mar 2006
    • Posts: 1,031
    • Post Thanks / Like

    Re: Text

    Did you receive my private message? I'll get working on the second one.

    • Join Date: Mar 2007
    • Posts: 3
    • Post Thanks / Like

    Re: Text

    Yes, i got all your messages.
    Big Thank you from me for you fast and very good help.


Similar Threads

  1. Advanced Text Analyser - Upgraded
    By Red5 in forum Text Analysis and Statistics
    Replies: 35
    Last Post: 13-Mar-2016, 14:55
  2. Mysterious text
    By englishstudent in forum General Language Discussions
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 02-Nov-2006, 10:05
  3. Please, could you correct mistakes in my English text?
    By George S in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 04-May-2006, 02:08
  4. text
    By ewelina in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 26-Apr-2006, 20:20
  5. "work"/"deal with" the text
    By Leo.Avilla in forum Text Analysis and Statistics
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 04-Feb-2006, 03:44


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts