I haven't written all of my corrections in red, but check out this emended version of your letter.
This letter is to express my interest in enrolling in the first-year Engineer Bachelor Program. Becoming an engineer has always been one of my main goals in life and my very first dream. To me, engineering is about being creative, solving problems , making decisions and last but not least, it is about teamwork. I am aware that engineers are often faced with the managing of large, complex projects so that becoming a good engineer requires good social and teamworking skills. I can gladly say that I have what it takes to live up to these standards.
How I see engineering? I believe engineering permeates every aspect of our daily life. Take, for instance, when I get up and take a shower (the shower unit which contains a pump and heat exchanger, and itself the process of producing large amounts of the shower gel we use, are engineering projects) or when I have my breakfast (cornflakes- making involves an engineering process), to driving or cycling or taking the bus or train to school or work (again, means of transport are engineering projects) as well as the infrastructure (roads, bridges, railways) along with the automation and control of the railway lines, traffic lights and the traffic control systems. Engineers have also designed the mobile phone, the computer, television, laptop, and a range of other everyday indispensible items.
During the past three years I have been studying Information Technology at Groep-t Highschool. I’m now completing my last year and hopefully I will have graduated this very month. I scored very good grades in my first and second year, the reason why I am encouraged and optimistic about enrolling in the engineering program. Furthermore, I have been working full- and part- time in Marketing, Hardware support and currently I’m working part- time for “****” As “****”.
My expectations with this program include:
1.Acquiring engineering knowledge and skills.
2.Becoming a designer, builder or a researcher in a technical field.
Should you need further information about my background and qualifications, do let me know.
I can be reached at XXX-XXX-XXXX or via email at EMAIL REMOVED - Send PM to This User Instead
I look forward to hearing from you.
Student or Learner