Here are a few suggestions, which appear in brackets in the text. One important thing to remember is the correct spelling of the word "mental." I also split some sentences into two to reduce the number of run-ons, and made a few additions in the interest of flow.Hi all teachers and scholars,
I am going to take the IELTS exam, pls drop some comments and proodread for my piece of essay writing, thank you a lots!!
Topic: More and more children’s writing & math ability are affected by computers and calculators. We should limit the use of those tools. Disagree or agree.
There is no doubt that both computers and calculators [have] become much more important in education and the learning process, [and also] in today’s society. [For example,] calculators enable students to [progress to] more complicated mathematical concepts instead of [having to spend so much] time [on mental] calculation. [Similarly,] computers have changed the traditional way of [teaching] writing into [something that is] easy, simple and fun. However, the development of computer and calculators [has] also cause a certain barriers to children’ abilities of writing and [mental] calculations.
Recently[,] researchers [have shown] that many children nowadays are too dependent on using calculators in their learning[.] [In many cases, they] tend to use the calculators in every mathematical computation, rather than using paper-pencil computations. The consequences of [this] situation can be [quite] serious[.] [F]or instance, the use of calculators [can] take away from [the] children[s]’ ability to think [for themselves] and reason through problems, and they [may] lose their confidence when the calculators are taken away.
The ease of writing with computers enable children [to alter] their writing [anywhere at any time;] they can simply adjust the writing by clicking the delete function key on the keyboard. [However,] they can not [perform] the same action if they [have already finished writing on paper]. However, computers [can] also allow them to find [m]any kind[s] of materials [on] the internet. [T]hus they might [be tempted] to copy others’ work instead of doing [it] by themselves. Paper writing enables children to develop certain writing skills, such as [organizing and preparing their ideas before they begin to write.]
To conclude, computers and calculators should be used as a supplementary tool for children to develop their writing and math skills[.] [However, certain] limitation[s] [are] necessary if they [misuse them], and teachers have the responsibility to promote a positive attitude toward children when they are using these learning tools.
Student or Learner