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  1. Newbie
    Student or Learner

    • Join Date: Sep 2007
    • Posts: 5
    #1

    can you please make corrections here.!!!!!!!!i would be thankful

    here is a formal letter i wrote,so can you please help me doing the corrections????????
    here it goes.


    Dear Sir,
    I am writting this letter in connection with the law mandating uniforms for NYC High School Students.

    As per the idea of passing a law that mandates uniforms for NYC High Schools. I whole heartedly aprreciate and agree the act you are going to take.And here are some of my point of view on pros of school uniforms.I hope it will be helpful.
    School Uniforms do alot of wholesome things such as it shows respect to each other and to the teachers as well.It gives a feeling of belongingness to a particular school. It also inhibit students
    from wasting time,focusing in clothes. School Uniforms in other way saves money too.It helps to maintain school discipline and decrease fighting and voilence that arise out of arguments over fashionable clothes.
    Like wise School Uniforms assist alot for the faculties,and environment of the school.

    So i think Students should be given school uniforms in High Schools for their betterment and the society as a whole.Lastly i cease here by saying "School Uniforms gives a spirit of learning and should be mandate by the Law."


    Yours Sincerely,
    .........

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
      • Home Country:
      • Malaysia
      • Current Location:
      • China

    • Join Date: Sep 2007
    • Posts: 118
    #2

    Re: can you please make corrections here.!!!!!!!!i would be thankful

    Quote Originally Posted by choezom View Post
    here is a formal letter i wrote,so can you please help me doing the corrections????????
    here it goes.


    Dear Sir,
    I am writting this letter in connection with the law mandating uniforms for NYC High School Students.

    I whole-heartedly aprreciate and agree with your action. Here are some of my views on the advantages of wearing school uniforms. I hope they will be helpful.
    A school uniform does a lot of wholesome things, such as it shows respect to one another and to the teachers as well. It gives one a feeling of belonging to the school. It also disallows students
    to waste time on picking what to wear at school. Wearing school uniforms saves money too. It helps to maintain school discipline and reduces fighting and violence that arise out of arguments over what is and what is not fashionable.
    Like wise School Uniforms assist alot for the faculties,and environment of the school.(???)

    So I think students should be given school uniforms in high schools for their own betterment and that of society as a whole. Lastly, I would like to end by saying school uniforms give a spirit of learning and should be mandated by regulation.


    Yours Sincerely,
    .........
    See the suggestions in red.

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