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  1. angliholic's Avatar
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    #1

    Smile deadpan/straight-faced/cold jokes

    I presume in English there are deadpan/straight-face jokes, but are they the same as "cold jokes?" If not, what are the differences in a nutshell? Thanks.


    • Join Date: Oct 2006
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    #2

    Re: deadpan/straight-faced/cold jokes

    I've never met a "cold joke" {apart from those about the cold}. Can you explain what you mean by it.

  2. angliholic's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: deadpan/straight-faced/cold jokes

    Thanks, Anglika.
    I think it's our language, and I wonder what the English counterpart is. Maybe it's dry humour; I'm not so sure that I need your confirmation.
    Here I'll try my best to explain it. Usually, it's a conversation between two persons. Any witty remark is regarded as "cold joke" that is least expected and makes people laugh but sometimes doesn't.

    For example,
    Wife: Old dead ghost (=her husband), we're running out of rice! I'm afraid that we don't have rice to eat for the next meal.
    Husband: Well! Why not eat bread?

    Here is another example,
    Person A: I'm so upset I dropped one thousand dollars (dropped means bost "lost" and "dropped" in our language).
    Person B: Why didn't you just pick it up?

    I hope you catch on what I mean. Do they sound like your dry humours?


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    #4

    Re: deadpan/straight-faced/cold jokes

    Yes - think they can be said to be "dry humour" or even "wry humour".


    This site gives some American examples: Kentucky is My Home! Dry Jokes

  3. angliholic's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: deadpan/straight-faced/cold jokes

    Thanks, Anglika, for your time and the awesome link.

  4. #6

    Re: deadpan/straight-faced/cold jokes

    Dumb Husband
    It's two o'clock in the morning and a husband and wife are asleep, when suddenly the phone rings. The husband picks up the phone and says, "Hello?... How the heck do I know? What am I, the weather man?" -- and prompty slams the phone down.
    His wife rolls over and asks, "Who was that?"
    The husband replies. "I don't know. Some guy who wanted to know if the coast was clear."
    __________________
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    Last edited by BobK; 01-Apr-2009 at 14:06. Reason: Link crippled

  5. BobK's Avatar
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    #7

    Re: deadpan/straight-faced/cold jokes

    If that link was the source of your joke, I'll reinstate it. If it was just a bit of spam, nice try

    b

  6. Ouisch's Avatar
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    #8

    Re: deadpan/straight-faced/cold jokes

    Some jokes from the master of deadpan humor, Steven Wright:

    All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.


    Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.


    I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.


    42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.


    "Did you sleep well?"
    "No, I made a couple of mistakes."


    I used to work in a fire hydrant factory.
    You couldn't park anywhere near the place.




  7. #9

    Re: deadpan/straight-faced/cold jokes

    Last Request
    Tragically, three friends die in a car crash, and they find themselves at the gates of heaven. Before entering, they are each asked a question by St. Peter.
    "When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning upon you, what would you like to hear them say about you?" asks St. Peter.
    The first guy says, "I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time, and a great family man."
    The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher who made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow."
    The last guy replies, "I would like to hear them say, "Look! He's moving!"
    ______________
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  8. #10

    Re: deadpan/straight-faced/cold jokes

    Southern Girl
    Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractive Blonde woman from Alabama arrived and bet twenty-thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I play Topless." With that, she stripped to the waist; rolled the dice; and yelled, "Come
    on, Baby, . Southern Girl needs new clothes!"
    As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up-and-down, and squealed..."YES! YES! I WON! I WON!"
    She hugged each of the dealers. Then she picked up her winnings and her clothes, and quickly departed.
    The dealers stared at each other dumfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?"
    The other ans wered, "I don't know. I thought you were watching."

    Moral --- Not all Southerners are stupid. Not all blondes are dumb. But, all men..... are men.
    _____________________
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