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    • Join Date: Sep 2007
    • Posts: 823
    #1

    if

    Hi there,
    please proofread the following sentences
    1. If it is dry, the river level falls.
    2. If you drop the vase, it breaks in pieces.
    3. If the water boils, it turns hot.
    4. The temperature falls if it turns cold.

    thanks
    pete


    • Join Date: Nov 2007
    • Posts: 38
    #2

    Re: if

    all look correct to me. only one thing:

    ' break in pieces' change this to : 'break into pieces'


    • Join Date: Nov 2007
    • Posts: 5,409
    #3

    Re: if

    1. If it is dry, the river level falls.
    I can think of situations is which this might be said, as opposed to, "..the river level will fall."
    2. If you drop the vase, it breaks in pieces.
    The use of the article "the" means that we are talking here and now about a particular vase, so you must write, ..."it will break into pieces."
    Otherwise, "If you drop the vase... like this...notice how it breaks into pieces.
    3. If the water boils, it turns hot.
    Because we have no preceding sentence, we must assume that 'it' refers to 'water' . The listener is then struck with the idea, well actually, the water has to be hot and get even hotter for the water to boil!! The only way I can think to salvage this sentence is, "When the water boils, it turns hot."

    4. The temperature falls if it turns cold.
    For this sentence to work as is, one has to assume someone is demonstrating how to read a thermometer after they take it home from the store, so "(You will notice that) the temperature falls if it (the weather) turns cold."
    Otherwise, a better sentence might be, "The temperature falls when it turns cold."
    Last edited by David L.; 06-Dec-2007 at 04:11.


    • Join Date: Sep 2007
    • Posts: 1,153
    #4

    Re: if

    Quote Originally Posted by peter123 View Post
    Hi there,
    please proofread the following sentences
    1. If it is dry, the river level falls.
    2. If you drop the vase, it breaks in pieces.
    3. If the water boils, it turns hot.
    4. The temperature falls if it turns cold.

    thanks
    pete
    I don't have a problem with your use of the word "if" but sentences #1 and #3 are not very good.

    1. If it is dry, the river level falls.

    It is not defined here. When I first read the sentence I thought "it" refered to the river!!!

    It is better to write it this way

    If the weather is dry, the river level falls.

    3. If the water boils, it turns hot.

    I have rarely seen cold water boil. It can happen it the pressure is reduced to almost a vacuum above the surface, but then it would not be hot water.

    It is the heating of the water that causes boiling....not the reverse. You have not constructed a logical sentence....grammatically ok...but not logical.

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