Although I am going to correct your essay, I am still learning Enlish. When I correct some words in your essay, it doesn't mean you are wrong nor do people understand your ideas , but I would like to bring up another option and hope this is an opportunity that I am going to learn English from you.
Note: Red= omit; Blue= rewrite
I had a nine-day travel to mainland Beijing in last February this year. The Great Wall was my favorite scenic spot, and I was very impressed by the magnificence scenery (should be compound sentences). The stair-steps that form the Great Wall of China are very steep and tall in some areas, and it is not only cliffy, but also dangerous so that it's very hard to climb. That is why had a Chinese people say (more than one Chinese says): "You're not a real man if you haven't climbed the Great Wall". I become became exhausted after climbing the wall and walking (paralell structure) no more than a kilometer or two. We just spent half of the day to stay there. As you know it is impossible to reach the top in the short time.
The Great Wall is famous around the world for its wall built and beautiful scenery. Many tourists come from all over the world. I met many foreigners, Korean, Japanese, Thai...etc. I canít couldn't speak their languages, but we introduced ourselves and our own country by using our limited English skills. In this instance is telling one truth everyone in the world, isnít it? At this moment, I realized that English was an international language that was useful to communicate to all people in the world.I thank for them who showed me many friendships. I do not have chance to meet each other anymore. I thanked them for the friendships and I did not thinkI have chance to meet them again.
Words cannot describe the beauty of the scene. I ascended the Great Wall and realized one of my dreams to travel all over the world. It was a great experience that I will not forget forever its beautiful scenes that I saw.
Student or Learner