I am not an English teacher, but I can comment on the meaning of (3) and (4), and possibly (2).
Telling someone to "grow a spine" (or "a backbone") is telling them to develop or display some courage. It implies that the person lacks courage or is behaving in a weak-willed and unassertive manner.
"To shock the shit out of someone" means to give them a very big fright, to subject them to an experience so terrifying, frightening or surprising that it causes them to evacuate fecal matter. Although this can happen literally, the expression is an example of hyperbole.
I would be interested to know if the word in (2) is "manner" or "manor". If the expression was "What brings you to my manor?" it would simply mean, "why have you come to my house?" or other location, such as workplace or some place that the speaker considers to be their own property. If the expression is "What brings you to my manner?", then its meaning escapes me.
Student or Learner