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Thread: my experience

  1. Senior Member
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    #1

    my experience

    The following is about a statement for college admission. If you see any problems, can I have your comment?

    As mentioned above, I belive these sports acitivies and working as a president of club in hight school will help me to adjust to college. I promise that i will do my best if I get accepted to your school. You will never regret choosing me.


    • Join Date: Jan 2007
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    #2

    Re: my experience

    Quote Originally Posted by bosun View Post
    The following is about a statement for college admission. If you see any problems, can I have your comment?

    As mentioned above, I believe these sports acitivies and my working as a president of a club in high school will help me to adjust to college life. I promise that I will do my best if I get accepted to your school. You will never regret choosing me.
    There are some simple mistakes. I have added the word "life" to make the phrase "college life" which fits better into this sentence.
    The phrase in italics "my working" uses a possessive prounoun with the gerund, which is something we often do in English.

  2. Senior Member
    Interested in Language
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    #3

    Re: my experience

    NiallRe: my experience
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by bosun
    The following is about a statement for college admission. If you see any problems, can I have your comment?

    As mentioned above, I believe these sports acitivies and my working as a president of a club in high school will help me to adjust to college life. I promise that I will do my best if I get accepted to your school. You will never regret choosing me.




    Why does "my working as a president of a club" need "a" before "president"? Can't it be omitted? Please.


    • Join Date: Jan 2007
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    #4

    Re: my experience

    It can be. And in fact, sounds better if it is.

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