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  1. new2grammar's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Punjabi
      • Home Country:
      • India
      • Current Location:
      • India

    • Join Date: May 2008
    • Posts: 880
    #1

    Kindly help me with this!

    Be ready now you will be a centre of attraction and the force of distraction at all social gatherings or at board meetings or simply put wherever you will go when you are dressed up with Balmain watches.

    Is the above line grammatically correct?
    Is there any better word than 'centre' to fit the above context?
    Do you find this line appealing and alluring customer specifically men?


    • Join Date: Oct 2006
    • Posts: 19,434
    #2

    Re: Kindly help me with this!

    Quote Originally Posted by new2grammar View Post
    Be ready now you will be a centre of attraction and the force of distraction at all social gatherings or at board meetings or simply put wherever you will go when you are dressed up with Balmain watches.

    Is the above line grammatically correct?
    Is there any better word than 'centre' to fit the above context?
    Do you find this line appealing and alluring customer specifically men?
    It is confusing. Keep it simple:

    Wherever you go, wearing your Balmain watch will make you the centre of attention.

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