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    • Join Date: May 2008
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    #1

    Do me a favour

    Hello !

    i want u to criticise this essay
    i want u to tell me its mistakes in grammar , structure and punctuation



    What have you learned about American Culture?


    What have you learned about American Culture?
    God created this wide world different in its nations and gave each nation a unique culture. From a critical point of view, you will find that the American culture is a unique and a special one. During these two years at Amideast, I have learned many things about American culture such as their social life, arts and festivals.

    I am one of the ACCESS students of the Amideast. Really I am very thankful for them because they have taught me the English language well. In this period, I liked English more than anything .Also, my knowledge has increased. I was excited to learn more and more about this culture and its history, so, I searched books, surfed the internet and asked my parents. Actually, I have identified with the Americans as I know much about their culture

    Through looking at the beginning of this culture, we can notice that the world was full of injustice and then George Washington came and united the states and formed the great country. After him, several presidents came and one of them was Abraham Lincoln who was the enemy of slavery and holds the mission of fighting it until the last day of his life. Great presidents still come to spread peace, freedom and knowledge all over the world.

    Social life was the first thing which I have learned about. Americans live in love, passion and mercy. They are one body؛ if any part of it complains, all other parts share it. Besides, they are one hand and one home despite their different religions and races. In America, there are Christians, Muslims and Jews. They live peacefully because our god in the sky is love and peace. People in America are very polite in dealing with others. In addition, when their sons and daughters become 18, they become independent and free. I agree with them because independence makes the boys and the girls strong courageous and can face all challenges. Moreover, at the weekends, friends and families invite each other to the cinema or to have a dinner in order to spend a happy time. People in there are simple and smart so, we should learn from them.

    Arts are the mirror of the cultures. American arts are around good values and about all the fields of life. Their movies are fantastic with amazing ideas and between fun and benefits for men, women and adults and even for children. Many people all over the world watch these movies so, America collect too much money from them. Also, there are many interesting and useful programs like (Oprah) the outstanding program. I hope to meet Oprah one day because she is a wonderful woman.

    Every country has its own festivals. Halloween was the first festival I knew. We celebrated it in here. We brought a big pumpkin, a lot of candies and masks. After finishing the preparation, we shared all classes the games and the candies. However it was weird, I liked that day very much. For lovers, America specified a day called (Valentine’s Day). It is a day where people express their love to someone by giving him or a red flower or a small gift. On the twelfth of February, America becomes red because all people wear red clothes and put red advertisements all over America.

    In conclusion, American culture is a unique one and we should regard it. Actually, I like America with all tastes, its movies with all flavors, its strange festivals even I like its political characters. Everything in America is fabulous and all nations must learn from this rich culture in order to live happily and successfully.
    .


    p.s I want your opinion in its grammar and structure not its ideas
    Last edited by Snow girl; 06-Jun-2008 at 21:21.

  1. tzfujimino's Avatar
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      • Japanese
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      • Japan
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    • Join Date: Dec 2007
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    #2

    Re: Do me a favour

    Quote Originally Posted by Snow girl View Post
    Hello !




    i want u to criticise this essay
    i want u to tell me its mistakes in grammar , structure and punctuation



    What have you learned about American Culture?

    God created this wide world different in its nations and gave each nation a unique culture. From a critical point of view, you will find that the American culture is a unique and a special one. During these two years at Amideast, I have learned many things about American culture such as their social life, arts and festivals.

    I am one of the ACCESS students of the Amideast. Really I am very thankful for them because they have taught me the English language well. In this period, I liked English more than anything .Also, my knowledge has increased. I was excited to learn more and more about this culture and its history, so, I searched books, surfed the internet and asked my parents. Actually, I have identified with the Americans as I know much about their culture.


    Through looking at the beginning of this culture, we can notice that the world was full of injustice and then George Washington came and united the states and formed the great country. After him, several presidents came and one of them was Abraham Lincoln who was the enemy of slavery and holds the mission of fighting it until the last day of his life. Great presidents still come to spread peace, freedom and knowledge all over the world.

    Social life was the first thing which I have learned about. Americans live in love, passion and mercy. They are one body؛ if any part of it complains, all other parts share it. Besides, they are one hand and one home despite their different religions and races. In America, there are Christians, Muslims and Jews. They live peacefully because our god in the sky is love and peace. People in America are very polite in dealing with others. In addition, when their sons and daughters become 18, they become independent and free. I agree with them because independence makes the boys and the girls strong courageous and can face all challenges. Moreover, at the weekends, friends and families invite each other to the cinema or to have a dinner in order to spend a happy time. People in there are simple and smart so, we should learn from them.

    Arts are the mirror of the cultures. American arts are around good and high values and about all fields of life. Their movies are fantastic with amazing ideas and mixed between fun and benefits for men, women, adults and even for children. Many people all over the world watch these movies so, America collect too much money from them. Also, there are many interesting and useful programs like (Oprah) which millions watch it according to what it has. I hope to meet Oprah one day because she is a wonderful woman.

    Every country has its own festivals. Halloween was the first festival I knew. We celebrated it in here. We brought a big pumpkin, a lot of candies and masks. After finishing of preparing, we shared all classes the games and the candies. However it was weird, I liked that day very much. For lovers, America specified a day called (Valentine’s Day). It is a day when people express their love to someone by giving him a red flower or a small gift. On the twelfth of February, America becomes red because all people wear red clothes and put red advertisements all over America.

    In conclusion, American culture is great and we have to look at it. I like the behavior of its people. I like its movies with all tastes, its songs with all flavors, its strange festivals even I like its political characters. Everything in America is fabulous and all nations must learn from this rich culture in order to live happily and successfully.


    p.s I want your opinion in its grammar and structure not its ideas
    I'm sorry I can't correct your mistakes, if any.
    I'm not a native speaker of English.
    Please wait for native speakers to proofread.

    I can feel your love for America. I think it's great!


    • Join Date: May 2008
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    #3

    Re: Do me a favour

    thank u sir , hope the others can help me :)


    • Join Date: May 2008
    • Posts: 7
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    #4

    Re: Do me a favour

    where r u guys?

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