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    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
      • Home Country:
      • China
      • Current Location:
      • China

    • Join Date: May 2008
    • Posts: 468
    #1

    as labelled on its back

    This morning I wrote a letter to my friend Richard which goes like this:
    Hi,Rich.
    After a long wait I received your gift-- a digital voice recorder yesterday. When I was finished with the four morning sessions, I was informed that I had a post office notice at the school incoming mail office located on another campus. I took a school bus in the afternoon and got to the office for the notification. After that I got home for my ID card and then hurried to the post office, which is not far from my home. I filled in a form and obtained the parcel before they closed. Yes, it was a parcel in which there was the recorder. And it was obvious that the parcel had been cut open for a check at the customs and then it was sealed again. I tried the recorder and it works well. Thanks again for your gift.
    Wooo, the weather at your place is so terrible. And on TV it was reported yesterday that in some parts of the Midwest it snowed but that in eastern American it is extremely hot. I'm afraid this is what global warming brings us. And aslo in southern China, there is a flood.
    Oh, I nearly forgot to tell you that it is interesting to notice that the voice recorder is also a Made-in-China product as labelled on its back. See Chinese products,especially petty merchandise, are everywhere, while your hi-tech products are everywhere.

    Just take care.
    Richard
    Would you please do me a favor and proofread it? I hope to learn something really useful from this process. As my friend is an very sick old gentleman, I can't bring myself to ask him to correct my letter to him. And also I think it would be awkward to ask the receiver of my letter to correct my letter. I had repeatedly asked him not to send me anything but he insisted.
    Please do me this favor!
    Thanks
    Richard


    • Join Date: Nov 2007
    • Posts: 5,409
    #2

    Re: as labelled on its back

    After a long wait

    This sounds like you had been waiting impatiently for either Richard to send it, or for it to arrive in the mail, neither of which I'm sure is your intention. So what did you mean by this?


    I received your gift yesterday : a digital voice recorder. When I had finished (with the-omit) my four morning sessions, I was informed that I had a post office notice at the school incoming mail office located on another campus. So I took a school bus in the afternoon and got to the campus office to pick up the notification card. Then I dashed home for my ID card and then to the post office, which is not far from my home. I filled in a form and collected the parcel before they closed. Yes, it was your parcel with the recorder! And it was obvious that the parcel had been cut open for a check at the customs and then (it was-omit) sealed again. I tried the recorder and it works fine/great. Thanks again so much for your gift.
    (You might like to add a few more words of appreciation here - he's taken a lot of trouble and some expense, in buying it, and postage!)

    Wooo, the weather at your place is so terrible. And on TV it was reported yesterday that in some parts of the Midwest it snowed but that in the eastern states
    'states' because you are not referring to the United States, but those states of the union in the east, versus states on the west coast.)

    it is extremely hot. I'm afraid this is what global warming brings us. And floods too, it seems, like the one in southern China.
    Oh, I nearly forgot to tell you - I noticed that the voice recorder is also a Made-in-China product, as labelled on its back.

    See Chinese products,especially petty merchandise, are everywhere, while your hi-tech products are everywhere.

    You may be being modest about your country and its products, versus the mighty States...but what you have inadvertently also implied is that the gift he has sent you is a piece of Chinese petty merchandise! The cheapskate (=stingy person/penny-pincher)!!
    You may wish to rephrase!

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
      • Home Country:
      • China
      • Current Location:
      • China

    • Join Date: May 2008
    • Posts: 468
    #3

    Re: as labelled on its back

    Thanks, David. Really my gratitude is beyond words. I thought no one would take so much trouble to correct my letter as it is relatively long for a post. In the letter, by "a long wait", I implied the efficiency of the customs offices might be unbearably low.I did not intend to criticize my friend but most probably he will think that way. In the ending of the letter, really I made another inexcusable mistake by talking about Chinese petty merchandise, though it was unintentional committed.
    To tell you everything about my profession, I am a teacher of English at a Chinese college. and I offer a course in English writing. But as you see, I myself do not have a high level of English proficiency. I have never had an opportunity to stay in an English speaking country for some time. So I feel sorry that I often make mistakes in my writings, which I always fail to get removed. I am determined to make good use of the Internet and seek help from you and other friends. I need your help, but I don't know whether it will cause you too much inconvenience and make you bored.
    Thanks again for pointing out all the mistakes in my letter.
    Richard

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