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    • Join Date: Aug 2008
    • Posts: 6
    #1

    I kindly request a competent reply

    Would you please be so kind as to tell me if this sounds rather foolish from the perspective of a native English speaker:

    "Dear passenger, wherever you may be, may you visit us on your best spree, and may we always with joy wait for thee! Therefore, do not hesitate and welcome!"

    I have some doubts about this "you" and "thee" parts (can they be mixed just for the purpose of rhyming?), the phrase "on one`s best spree" (does it exist at all..?), etc., so I would really make use of a(n) (native) English teacher`s comment!

    Thank you a lot in advance!

    Respectfully,
    Dragana


    • Join Date: Oct 2006
    • Posts: 19,434
    #2

    Re: I kindly request a competent reply

    Welcome to the forums.

    Quote Originally Posted by dragana.rs View Post
    Would you please be so kind as to tell me if this sounds rather foolish from the perspective of a native English speaker:

    "Dear passenger, wherever you may be, may you visit us on your best spree, and may we always with joy wait for thee! Therefore, do not hesitate and welcome!"

    I have some doubts about this "you" and "thee" parts (can they be mixed just for the purpose of rhyming?), the phrase "on one`s best spree" (does it exist at all..?), etc., so I would really make use of a(n) (native) English teacher`s comment!

    Thank you a lot in advance!

    Respectfully,
    Dragana
    "Dear passenger, wherever you may be,
    may you visit us on your best
    next spree.
    and may we always with joy wait for thee! We with joy will wait for thee!
    Therefore, do not hesitate; and welcome!" you will welcome be!

    Since you are writing "advertising doggerel", I would not worry too much about the use of "thee", but scanning properly is important.


    • Join Date: Aug 2008
    • Posts: 6
    #3

    Re: I kindly request a competent reply

    "advertising doggerel"

    Thank you a lot for a prompt piece of advice!

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