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  1. enydia's Avatar

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    #1

    how to clarify and simplify this phrase

    Hello, Teachers.

    How to clarify and simplify this phrase:

    the ever-increasing divide between the rich and the poor and the ever-increasing divide between the urban and rural areas and the low transparency and inefficiency of government department

    It would be very nice if you could provide me with some rules or experience about clarifying and simplifying such phrases.

    Thanks in advance

    Enydia :)

    73-82
    Last edited by enydia; 24-Sep-2008 at 12:47.


    • Join Date: Oct 2006
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    #2

    Re: how to clarify and simplify this phrase

    Quote Originally Posted by enydia View Post
    The ever-increasing divide between the rich and the poor and , as well asthe ever-increasing divide between the urban and rural areas and , together with the low transparency and inefficiency of government departments
    ..

  2. enydia's Avatar

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    #3

    Re: how to clarify and simplify this phrase

    Quote Originally Posted by Anglika View Post
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by enydia
    The ever-increasing divide between the rich and the poor and , as well as the ever-increasing divide between the urban and rural areas and , together with the low transparency and inefficiency of government departments


    ..
    Thank you, Anglika.

    Can I omit the second 'the ever-increasing divide' (in red)?

  3. BobK's Avatar
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    #4

    Re: how to clarify and simplify this phrase

    That clause needs something: you could shorten it by saying 'as well as the one between...' or 'as well as that between' (where 'that' is a demonstrative pronoun, unlike the first word of this post, which is a demonstrative adjective). Or you could rework the first two clauses like this:

    'The ever-increasing divideS between the rich and the poor on one hand, and between the urban and rural areas on the other hand...'

    b
    Last edited by BobK; 24-Sep-2008 at 14:57. Reason: tweaked format

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    #5

    Re: how to clarify and simplify this phrase

    Quote Originally Posted by enydia View Post
    Hello, Teachers.

    the ever-increasing divides between the rich and the poor and between the urban and rural areas, and the low transparency and inefficiency of government departments

    I don't think you need anything more.


    Enydia :)

    73-82
    2006

  4. enydia's Avatar

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    #6

    Re: how to clarify and simplify this phrase

    Thank you very much, Teachers.

    I saw someone omit the second 'the' in 'gap between the rich and the poor', ie 'gap between the rich and poor' or 'divide between the haves and have-nots'. Is this omission grammatical?

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    #7

    Re: how to clarify and simplify this phrase

    The ever-increasing divide between the rich and poor and those living in the urban or rural areas, coupled with the low transparency and inefficiency of government departments . . .

  5. Raymott's Avatar
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    #8

    Re: how to clarify and simplify this phrase

    Quote Originally Posted by enydia View Post
    Thank you very much, Teachers.

    I saw someone omit the second 'the' in 'gap between the rich and the poor', ie 'gap between the rich and poor' or 'divide between the haves and have-nots'. Is this omission grammatical?
    I don't think so. But you can omit both.
    "The gaps between rich and poor, urban areas and rural, as well as the low transparency and inefficiency of government departments ... "

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